


Serene Detachment

by IslaF



Category: Naruto
Genre: Blood, Boat, Island - Freeform, M/M, Stranded, Survival, beach, deserted, future smut, in-progress, multichap, survive
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-25
Updated: 2015-06-23
Packaged: 2018-03-20 16:01:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 37,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3656397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IslaF/pseuds/IslaF
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Modern AU // Naruto brings Sasuke along for a short boat vacation to enjoy the beginning of warm weather, but is unexpectedly forced to endure drifting away with the current and finding himself, and his guest, stranded on an empty beach with nothing but forest behind it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> Normally I write one-shots but I think I'm going to make this a multi-chap for once and see how it works out. Also I have no idea how boats work so if I fucked something up, I'm sorry. I'm going to do my best to please you all so I hope you enjoy!
> 
>  
> 
> ****If you want to, you can listen to the _Expolsions In The Sky_ station on Pandora and it'll give you a nice feel.**

Sasuke is pissed at me, as usual. But his office job is seriously stressing him out and it's about that time of year where it's getting warm enough to head out on the boat again. I usually go with the entire friend group (minus Sasuke because he's "busy"—I think he's scared of boats), but I feel bad for always leaving Sasuke out. He's my best friend and never ends up wanting to go, so this can just be a me-and-him thing this time. It'll be fun either way because I'm entertaining enough for the both of us. He's pissed because he doesn't want to come, as usual. He doesn't think I'm "experienced enough" to drive the boat around. It isn't hard, my dad taught me and I do it all the time with our friend group. He probably is a big pussy who's scared of the Pacific Ocean. Well he's going to have to endure it for a couple days while we're out.

It's a perfect day to be on the water. The sun is so bright and there's not a cloud in the sky. The large white sailboat sits near the dock as I walk ahead of Sasuke. He groans and sighs and the sun is already giving him a small sunburn on his cheeks. Good thing I brought sunscreen. His pale ass is gonna need it. He has a small bag with him which probably contains boring shit, like books, and his change of clothes. I have a little basket of stuff—a cord to hook my music up to the speakers on the deck, sun screen (mainly for Sasuke), a couple hats, food for a couple days (junk food and crackers), and a gallon of water. Everything else we need should be on the boat already because my dad had already readied it for us earlier in the morning. So sweet.

I look behind me and see Sasuke squinting his eyes so hard they almost disappear entirely. I tilt my head up to see from under my sun hat. "Did you not bring sunglasses?" I ask.

Sasuke's unbuttoned pale-blue flannel gently flows with the soft breeze. It goes well with his tan shorts. His white undershirt wrinkles as he folds his arms. "You didn't tell me to." Bitch, why do I have to tell you to bring fucking sunglasses.

I control my anger. "There's probably an extra pair in the cabin, don't worry."

"I wasn't worried," Sasuke snaps. Damn, maybe I should have left him at home. I set my stuff down on the sole of the boat and motion for Sasuke to head over, as well. I see him frown and try as steadily as he can to step onto the boat without falling. He falls onto the boat anyway and drops his bag. I laugh hysterically, naturally.

"Ahahahahaha! Oh shit, get up, you bastard," I laugh as I extend my hand to him but he sneers with a 'fuck you' and pushes himself up and grabs the strings of his bag.

"I knew I shouldn't have agreed to this," Sasuke mumbles as his hand wipes his face.

"Awh, you don't mean that, teme, you needed some fresh air. This trip will be good for you!"

"Whatever."

I set things up: I turn the music on, check the lines and set them, inspect absolutely everything to make sure the trip to nowhere and back won't scare Sasuke so much, but I'm sure my dad's already checked everything or he wouldn't have given me the go-ahead. This boat is like his second child. I tidy things up that my dad missed, set a sunhat on Sasuke's head, and hand him a pair of sunglasses and the gallon of water to refill his bottle. He drank his entire bottle of water on the walk here. Way to be hydrated I guess. Or nervous.

The boat gently rocks as tiny waves hit the sides before I unwrap the rope keeping us here from the post and throw it onto the bow. I check up on Sasuke. He's just staring out at the water. Maybe he's alright with this now. I walk past my basket to pick up the bottle of sunscreen and throw it at Sasuke. He easily catches it and undoes the cap. Good, he listens.

I head to the wheel and steer us into the pacific.

* * *

About a half hour into our two-day trip, Sasuke is heaving. He smells like sunscreen and vomit. I should have brought some Dramamine or something, but I didn't think he'd get this sick. I notice a bright red duffel bag on the floor of the cockpit with a note on it.

"Just in case.

Love you,

Dad."

I unzip it to find a shit ton of emergency stuff. Thanks for believing in me, dad, damn. He even put a pack of protein bars in here. Ew. I zip the emergency bag up before I head to my basket of shit and grab a pack of saltines for Sasuke and sit next to him on the flat floor of the deck. My hand touches his when I hand him the pack of crackers and he mumbles a 'thanks' as he pulls it open. I didn't think this mini vacation would be babysitting Sasuke. I know he can take care of himself but I feel bad, like it's my fault he feels so shitty. He'll lighten up. Hopefully.

We sail along, sitting next to each other on the floor, and I try to chat with him about the girls we know but he doesn't open up, like normal. Maybe he just isn't interested in any of them. He isn't really contributing to the conversation at all though. He would usually at least insult them but he just isn't talking. Sasuke abruptly jumps up and leans over the side of the boat to puke up the crackers. It lasts a good minute or so before he wipes his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt and returns to his spot next to me. "Teme, do you want me to take you back? I feel kinda bad about your shittiness."

"I'm not shitty."

"You are throwing up over the side of the boat."

"So what."

"You are fucking difficult, you know that?"

"I've heard it once or twice."

"Alright well be prepared for two days of upset stomach, then."

Throughout the day, I snack on various junk food and Sasuke continues nibbling at his crackers and downing his water. The entire gallon is gone before it gets dark. Not a problem, though, because my dad left a few in here for us along with that emergency bag. God bless that man. I try to calm Sasuke down by talking about things and getting his mind off the rocking, but he just gets angry.

"Shut the hell up, idiot, I'm not a baby. I don't—" he's interrupted by his gurgling stomach. "I don't fucking need a mommy, I'm a grown man!" He gets up again to throw up over the boat, and more crackers spill from his stomach.

"You sure are. Look at you, throwing up like a champ." I smirk at my own remark and Sasuke's scowl doesn't phase me.

I grin bigger when he says, "Fuck you. I should have taken your opportunity to go home when I had the chance."

"Well you're stuck with me until tomorrow now. Hahahaha get over it, asshole."

Although the day was perfectly clear and hot, when it hits night there are a few clouds in the sky and it turns almost chilly. Nothing too bad though, I can still see the stars. I lie down on the deck and Sasuke follows suit. What a follower. Maybe he just wants to stay safe so he goes where I go?

We don't talk for at least an hour. We lie there in the dark, illuminated by natural light, admiring their purpose as clouds slowly accumulate.

"Dammit, the weather guy said it was going to be clear both days. I hope it doesn't rain tomorrow," I say. If it rains on teme's poor belly I'm going to shit on someone.

"I'm sorry," I hear Sasuke mumble.

It really catches me off-guard. I turn to look at him and ask, "What?"

"I don't know, I didn't want you to have a shit time but I really can't enjoy myself. I feel like shit. I really wish I stayed home," Sasuke explains. He appears almost guilty and won't look me in the eye.

"It's okay. I shouldn't have forced you to come," I start. "I just wanted you to enjoy yourself instead of always working."

"I enjoy working," Sasuke tries to convince me. He sounds almost insulted.

"Yeah fucking right," my tone is a lot harsher than I intended it to be. "You always have bags under your eyes and can't ever focus because your job stresses you out. Doesn't it feel good to get away from it for at least a couple of days?"

He turns to look at me. "Honestly, I would rather be working than sitting in a puddle of my own vomit on a boat with someone who gets on my last fucking nerve," Sasuke spits. Wow. Well, alright.

"Well if that's how it is, fine. Sorry I bothered. I won't invite you anymore if that's what you want." What started as an apology turned into attacking me, like… what the fuck, Sasuke the Drama Queen should be his nickname. I know he's just mad about his upset stomach, so I should give him space.

I push myself up and head into the boat's cabin while Sasuke continues to lie in the clouded starlight, clutching his torso. His hat's fallen off and is sitting by his head with his sunglasses tucked inside it.

The cabin is kind of nice. It's clean, at least. Two white couches face each other with a small pathway in-between them. Behind them is a short hallway leading to a bathroom and a small bedroom. I head to the bathroom, take a quick piss, wash my hands, and then head into the bedroom. Dad must have put fresh sheets in here. He was seriously on it this morning. I crawl onto the bed and don't even get under the sheets. I stay on top of them and close my eyes and hope the morning comes soon to put Sasuke out of his misery.

* * *

My eyes snap open when someone, obviously Sasuke, shakes me awake. His eyes are wide and afraid and he's completely soaked.

"Whoa, what happened, Sasuke? Are you alright?" The boat rocks almost violently.

He is breathing so hard. He's totally panicked. "S-s-storm, there's a storm, Naruto, there's a fucking storm, what the fuck do we do? Oh my God what the FUCK DO WE DO!?" His voice is trembling and his words run together.

Just a storm? "Sasuke, it's okay, there's storms out here all the time, it'll be okay, don't worry."

"Are you sure? Are the waves supposed to be that big?" He's totally panicked.

"Calm down, it's alright," I actually feel really bad for him, he's like a child. Horrified. I scoot off of the bed and pull open the blankets I was just lying on top of. I push the soaking flannel off of his shoulders and down his arms. I reach for the bottom of Sasuke's undershirt. "Here, take this off, and climb into the bed, alright? I'll go check things out." A 'grown man' my ass. I bet no one has seen this side of Sasuke before. I didn't know Sasuke was seriously afraid of anything. Sasuke is stripped to his boxers and clutching the covers so tightly while he is engulfed in the comfort of soft sheets. I hear him, very innocently ask, "Hurry up," and then he tries to recover some of his pride with, "Dumbass."

I turn to head out onto the deck and whisper, "It'll be okay," to Sasuke. Maybe to myself, too.

The door slams back against the wall as soon as I open it. Sasuke wasn't exaggerating. The waves have to be at least 17 feet high. I've seen higher, but never while I've been the one in control of the boat. My dad could take care of this no problem… but I, I don't think I have enough experience. Lightning is bright across the sky, in an almost endless stream. The boat rocks from side to side. Each time waves crash harshly against the sides, water floods the deck. One comes up over my head and I'm immediately drenched, as if I wasn't already from the piercing rain.

I take down the main sail, which I curse myself for not doing before I fell asleep. I watch as Sasuke's hat and sunglasses are grabbed by a wave and pulled into the ocean. I grasp the things that remain on the deck (Sasuke's water bottle, one of his books, a half used gallon of water) and bring them into the cabin. I wrestle with the wind to shut the door and when it does shut, it's with a loud  _bang_. I drop the soaked belongings onto the floor and pull my shirt off as I head back to the bedroom to check on baby Sasuke.

God, he is pathetic. He's tucked himself under the covers and all I can see sticking out are his dark spikes of hair near the headboard. A wave crashes into the side of our vessel and I stumble onto the floor. I get up and grab onto the bed before another wave repeats the action. "You alright, Sasuke?" He moves the blanket away from his face and he has a slight blush of embarrassment. His eyes are still large and afraid.

"Is it okay? Is this normal?" He immediately asks.

Should I lie? If I tell him the truth he's going to be even worse. I see his face lose color and I quickly run to the entrance to get a bucket exclusively for this purpose. I reach Sasuke before he pukes into it. He looks at me, embarrassed again, and repeats his question. "Are we going to be alright? Naruto?"

"Yes. Yes, we're going to be fine Sasuke, don't worry. This is normal. I've been in worse situations, believe me," I lie. "Do you want me to get your bag for you?" He might want to put his sweats on or something, if he brought some. He nods. I run and get it for him—tripping more than once from the boat's swaying—and then change into my own dry clothes. I come back to now-Sasuke's bed. The entire room moves up and down and side-to-side. "Scoot over," I demand. He complies and I lift the covers to scoot myself in. "I know it'll be hard for you, Sasuke, but try to get some sleep. It'll pass before you know it. Just as fast as it showed up, it'll be gone." He looked at me extremely skeptically. I lie on my back and tuck an arm under my head.

I almost find sleep, until a very cold hand grabs onto my arm.

* * *

It happens so fast. You never expect these things to happen to you. But here we are. Sasuke was asleep, clutching my arm as tight as he could with his nervous, slender hands. The rocking may have made Sasuke nervous, but began to lull me to sleep. I was so close. But I'm glad I never found it. A hard wave hit the boat and instead of rocking, the boat broke. Windows shattered and water began pouring in through the broken glass openings. Nothing too major yet, but there was another wave.

And another.

And another.

Sasuke was already jumping out of the sheet and putting a black, long-sleeved shirt on. His eyes were alarmed and his hands… I've never seen Sasuke's hands shake so horribly. I quickly threw on clothes, as well. I ran to the other side of the bed and grabbed Sasuke's arm to pull him along with me. Water buried our feet as I hurriedly tried to get Sasuke out of the cabin. Now, he's having another panic attack and I don't have the nerve to tell him I'm on the verge of one too. I've never had to deal with this either, God dammit! What am I supposed to do? The rain is wicked—stinging and cold. The wind is fierce and Sasuke clutches my hand as tight as he can. What am I looking for? What am I doing? …The life raft! Where the fuck is the life raft!? The rain makes it almost impossible to see anything. I look around frantically for the poor excuse for a safety device. I spot it within the next minute, pull the tab to inflate it, and push it over the edge of the boat.

"What are you doing!?" Sasuke screams. The water is making his hair stick to his face. He's terrified. I've never wanted to give Sasuke a hug as bad as I did right then, but there were more important things to do, like save our lives.

"We have to get off of this boat!" The waves make it so hard to hear even while we're yelling right next to each other. Sasuke falls down from the wetness and the rocking. He doesn't try to get up. He just sits there in a sad puddle of defeat, staring at the floor. "The cabin is almost entirely underwater! This bitch is sinking, Sasuke! And I'm not letting us go down with it! Get in the life raft, now!" He looks down at the orange, sorry-excuse for hope, and climbs down as slowly as possible. I immediately follow him and I push us away from the boat. I use the included paddle to get us far away so we don't sink along with it when the entire thing falls. I glance at Sasuke. On his knees in disbelief. Can't say I'm much different.

We are in awe. Sitting in the bright orange life raft, the tent-like hood gives us no relief from the rain as we stare at my dad's pride and joy sink into the Pacific Ocean. He's going to kill me. Then I realize… the supplies. The emergency bag my dad left us. There's no way in hell we would live out here without it. A week at best, and what if no one finds us by then?

I can't fucking believe this. "I… have to go back," I say barely above a whisper.

"What?!" Sasuke yells. "No, you're staying here, I'm not letting you go back there!"

"Sasuke! If I don't, we will die in days! _Days_! We won't last without those supplies! If anything, you'll get more room for yourself in this dinky raft." I smile at my sad attempt at a joke in this situation and dive into the water.

"Naruto!" I hear Sasuke scream. He screams it over and over, loud and bloodcurdling.  _Naruto! Naruto!_ I'm not going to be the reason we die. I'm going to die trying. The sailboat is almost entirely underwater. I swim to the top, what would be the bow, and take a deep breath before diving down. I manage to open the door to the cabin relatively easily.

But where is it?

Where is the bag? I don't remember where I saw it. Was it in the cabin? No… No it was in the cockpit. Fucking hell! I go deeper, it's after the cabin. It's so dark, I can't see a fucking thing. My head gets so light and I'm losing my air. This can't be where it ends… But I feel it. The strangely thick fabric of the duffel bag. It's caught on the ledge next to the wheel. Talk about luck. I grab it, sling it around my neck and try as hard as I can to make it back to the surface. I'm still running out of time.

This boat could totally sink at any minute and take me with it. I break the surface and swear I have never taken a fresher breath of air in my entire life. Sasuke is still screaming my name. Didn't know he loved me so much. Maybe he just doesn't want to be stuck out here by himself. Haha how am I still making jokes, he would love that.

I swim back to the orange raft and hear the relief in Sasuke's voice, "Oh shit, oh thank God, you're okay, and you got the bag." He reaches his hand out and helps me into the raft. We watch the ship sink together as our little raft drifts away at the mercy of these merciless waves.

My heart sinks to my stomach when I look at Sasuke's face. He's so understandably bewildered. This is almost the worst thing that could have happened. But least we're both alive.

Sasuke quiets down, but still manages to throw up into the ocean a few more times before calming down a lot. The waves calm, as well. We fall asleep that night closer friends than we were earlier, but if you ask me, this is definitely the beginning of our troubles.


	2. Day 2-3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really enjoy writing this. Mostly because I always watch survival-type shows and wanted to read a story about Sasuke and Naruto in this kind of situation, but they seem to be in short supply. So I thought I would contribute. Anyway, don't worry, romance between them will come, we just gotta let the story live its own life and wait for these beautiful boys to grow together. (:
> 
> ****Again, if you want a nice feel for this story, _Explosions In The Sky_ Pandora station is perfect!**

So we drift.

We drift into seemingly nothingness as the waves calm and the clouds part and the night turns into day. Sasuke fell asleep, finally. He has to be worn out. I am. I haven't slept at all. I'm sure someone will notice we're gone when we don't show back up tonight, but I'm mostly stressing out about my dad. He'll be glad I'm okay but also kill me because his damn boat is at the bottom the ocean. What am I going to do? That boat was his life.

I glance down at Sasuke, who has his head next to my thigh. The life raft is large enough for each of us to lie down next to each other side by side, but he's curled up in his wet clothes sleeping close to me instead. I sit crisscross and lean against the back wall of the raft (if you can call it a wall, just rubbery fabric really). I run my fingers through Sasuke's hair and attempt to relieve him of the excess water in it. The last thing I want is for one of us to get a cold on top of all this. And Sasuke is sure to get sea-sick again.

"I'm so sorry, Sasuke," I whisper. His hair is so slick. His bangs have almost completely dried but the back of his head is still soaked. I lightly muss it up with my hand and free more water droplets. "God, I am so fucking sorry. I really hope we make it out of this."

We are at the mercy of the sea. I roll the front flap of our tent-like raft up the rest of the way, so it stops flapping around, and tie it with the attached strings. Ocean. All I can see is ocean. There is no land anywhere. No boats. Nothing.

However, the sunrise is beautiful. I've never seen anything like it. The deep blue slowly fades lighter and orange rays prove the sun's existence. I feel hopeful. We'll definitely be out of the ocean by nightfall. My dad has to know about the storm by now. Hopefully, he'll try to get in touch with the boat's radio. Once he can't reach us, he'll be out here. We won't have to wait until tomorrow after-all, I'm sure.

Sasuke stirs. I realize my fingers are gliding through his dark tresses again and I quickly pull my hand away. He had only been sleeping for maybe an hour, I hope he isn't waking up yet. He needs rest. Also, I don't want him to yell at me again. I'm too exhausted.

Sasuke lifts his head and dreamily looks out the life raft's door, propped up on his elbow. I see the corners of his mouth sink, and his head falls back to where it was previously. I pull the big duffle bag into my lap and unzip it. Good thing this thing is waterproof. Damn, dad really did pack absolutely everything in here. From a blanket, to a flashlight, to a knife, to a first aid kit and matches. There's more than that but I'm mostly focused on grabbing the12-pack box of protein bars because I'm fucking starving. I pick two out and dangle one in front of Sasuke's face. He's still staring at the ocean but smacks the food out of my hand.

"I don't want it."

"Sasuke, you need to eat something."

"I'm not hungry. Besides, I'll probably just puke it back up."

"Well we have the—oh. No, the saltines were on the boat, weren't they?"

"Not like that would help anyway," Sasuke said. It sounded like he was trying to make me feel better about it but I just feel even worse. My stomach comes up my throat when he unexpectedly adds, "We're going to die out here."

"Fuck you, Sasuke, don't say shit like that! My dad will notice something happened, alright? He probably knew about the storm and when he couldn't reach us, he probably sent someone out here. He knows where we went so…"

"Does he also know how far and in which direction we're drifting? We don't even know where we are, idiot. The current is pulling us to God knows where. We have, what, one pack of food and a gallon of water? How long will that last? We can't drink sea water. We have no way of making a fire on this rubber tent. We're done."

I'm shocked. How long has he been awake thinking about this? Did he feel me touching his hair, oh shit. That's the least of my concerns right now, though. Sasuke's right. He isn't an idiot and I should stop treating him like one. We're both new to this situation so we need to suck it up and … well what can we do? Wait, I guess. Suck it up and hope someone out there will find us.

* * *

I guess I fell asleep for a little bit. I lost my watch, but I'm guessing it's around the afternoon. Sasuke doesn't seem nearly as seasick as he was on the boat. He's still staring out into the ocean. He looks so damn sad. His knees are up to his chest with his arms wrapped around them. His chin rests on his arms as his now-dry hair occasionally moves with the slight breeze from the sea.

When I move to get comfortable, he turns to look back at me with a subdued expression. Does he blame me? "You should drink some water," Sasuke suggests. "It's getting pretty hot already. The shade from this raft won't keep you from becoming dehydrated." And with that, Sasuke turns his face away from me again. I decide to take his advice and grab the water gallon from the bag and take a couple gulps. I offer the jug to Sasuke, who just shakes his head. "I'm not thirsty yet."

"Sasuke, please drink some."

"I said I don't want—"

"—God damn, stop being so fucking difficult. Take your own advice and drink some damn water."

Sasuke pouts and snatches the gallon from me. He sips at it over the course of a half hour, but I still think I drank more in a couple gulps than he did the entire time he had the gallon in his grasp.

* * *

It grows dark and I'm trying my hardest not to scarf down every damn protein bar that's lying in the emergency bag. I'm so fucking hungry. I've eaten two today, though. Sasuke hasn't even eaten one. I offer him one for the fifth time today and he refuses again. After about ten minutes of silence, Sasuke breathes a sharp gasp. It scares me and I stare at him as he grabs for the emergency bag.

"Sasuke, what the—"

He interrupts me. "A ship. There's a ship! God dammit, Minato, if you truly love your son—Ha! Yes! God, fucking—" My eyes widen. A flare gun. Sasuke's eyes well up with tears. He's laughing, relieved and sad and excited. His fingers fumble with the package. He throws the plastic container into the water once the gun and flare cartridges spill onto the floor of our raft. I stare out into the ocean and I'm not even sure it's a ship. It's just a light. And it's all the way on the horizon, which is two or three miles away. But God damn, I'm going to put my trust in this stupid ship and we're going to go home.

Sasuke starts yelling, "Hey! HEY!" while he fills the gun with a cartridge. He raises it to the sky and fires with a  _POP_ and a  _FFFF_. The red flare is bright and demands attention. It smokes and curves down and the light diminishes. I remember the flashlight. My dad left a flashlight. I hope he remembered batteries. I hurriedly dig through the bag and pull out the flashlight. It easily turns on. God bless you, dad. I wave the light around and yell along with Sasuke.

After a few minutes we quiet down from sore throats and I only wave the flashlight.

Then we wait.

And we wait.

Eventually Sasuke's smile fades. The assumed-to-be ship disappears. Sasuke's adrenaline dies and he slumps down. "It didn't see us," he starts. "How the hell didn't it see us?! We are right fucking here! How can you miss the damn flare in the black hole we're floating in!?" He picks up the remaining four flares that became scattered to the edges of the raft from all of the excitement. He holds them in his palm and just stares at them.

"We still have four more, teme, more ships will come along, I'm sure." I try to console him but he's not having any of it. I understand, though. He's never been one to be optimistic. I scoot close to him and wrap an arm around his shoulders to bring him to me. "It'll be alright! We've got each ocher! And someone has  _got_  to know we're missing by now. We were supposed to be home hours ago. They'll be everywhere looking for us tomorrow, don't you worry, teme." I smile at him, but his frown is still there.

* * *

The ocean cools the night significantly and I ask Sasuke to zip the raft's flap shut. I'm freezing and hungry and tired. Shit, I want to go home. I look at Sasuke, who is curled up in a ball again. I open up the emergency bag, remembering the foil blanket my dad packed. Was this bag just meant for me? Because everything in here is like, single serving. Should I give the blanket to Sasuke? If we only use it on our arms, it could lay across both of us. I go with the latter.

I try not to rock the raft too much as I crawl over to Sasuke. He's lying on his side, and I press my back to his as I lie down. He doesn't seem to mind. I take the foil blanket, and when I lay it horizontally across us, Sasuke grabs a hold of it immediately. I feel him pull it close to him as he tries to capture heat from my body, too, by backing into me as much as he can. His shoulder blades practically stab me; this asshole is too skinny. I'm going to try and get him to eat something again tomorrow. He didn't puke or dry heave or anything today. Maybe his body is finally adjusting.

A silent 'thank you' escapes Sasuke as a relieved sigh. I'll take it. "Goodnight, Sasuke."

"Goodnight."

* * *

When I open my eyes in the morning, Sasuke is already awake. He has the flap rolled up and tied, and he's sitting in front of the opening like a child waiting for his father to return from work. I push the foil blanket to the side and wipe my eyes as a giant yawn escapes me.

"Sleep well?" I ask.

"Not really," he replies. "You move too much in your sleep." As if the raft constantly moving from waves had nothing to do with it.

When he turns around to look at me, his eyes are bloodshot, half lidded, and he has dark circles under them. "Holy shit, you look awful."

"Fuck you, at least I don't look like a dobe all the time."

"Did you not sleep at all?!" Sasuke doesn't respond. He just turns back to look at endless blue waves. "Did you eat anything? Drink anything?" Sasuke continues to ignore me. "Shit, you need to eat something." I dig in our vault and grab a protein bar. "If you don't eat this teme, I'm going to beat the crap out of you." I toss it into his lap. He stares at it a while. If he doesn't get something into his system and get some rest he's going to have serious issues on top of the ones we already have.

Slowly, he tears open the wrapper and takes a bite of the protein bar. About fucking time. "This tastes like shit," Sasuke tells me between chews. I see him struggle to swallow it.

"Get the hell over it. And you have a cup of water to drink afterwards. Quit telling me to take care of myself when you don't take care of yourself, asshole." I hand him the jug of water. I hear him groan.

"My stomach doesn't want anything," he complains with a mouth full of protein bar.

"Well it needs something." I eye him until he finishes the protein bar and drinks a decent amount of water. We should be conserving it, but not drinking any at all would hurt us even more. Especially in Sasuke's case.

He twists the lid back onto the jug and tosses it into the corner.

* * *

For hours we sit in silence. Hours. The only time either one of us gets up is to take an occasional piss out the front of the raft. I decide to limit myself to one protein bar a day and eat one when it hits late afternoon. Sasuke… I would let him eat every damn bar if he wanted, but it's hard enough just getting him to eat  _one_. I did end up getting him to eat another one, though. Seven left.

I don't want to even think about how much water is left. I know there's less than half a gallon to share and I honestly have no clue what to do once that's gone. I heard once that the ocean is the largest desert. And unfortunately for us, there's not even a hint of a lie in that statement.

* * *

When night does finally come, I ask Sasuke if he wants to play a game. I expect him to say no, but he turns to me and immediately comes out with a 'yes'. I guess his mind needs to be exercised.

"Okay," I start, "The game is super simple. We start with a category, such as 'colors' and we go through the alphabet naming off a color that starts with that letter. And it has to go really fast. First person who can't think of something right away loses."

As expected, he picks it up easily. He's beaten me twice already. The category now is 'Animals'. I start with, "Anaconda."

"Bear," Sasuke says quickly.

"Cat."

"Dog."

"Elephant."

"Frog."

"Goose."

"Hamster."

"Iguana."

"Jaguar."

"..uh, fuck! Dammit!" I lose. Again. I shouldn't have brought this damn game up.

"You could have said lots of things. 'Kangaroo' for Christ's sake. Who wouldn't think of that?" Sasuke asks.

"Shut up, asshole! I was feeling pressured!" I'm kind of just messing with him now. I'm happy he has some personality back, even if it's at the expense of my humiliation.

We continue to play our alphabet game until it's very dark and very cold. It's awesome we found something to take our mind off of this situation. I'm going to try and come up with something else in-case we get bored of this. I wish I didn't have to come up with a new game, but I honestly doubt we'll be saved anytime soon. Sasuke was right. How far off have we drifted?

I shut our raft flap and reach for our sorry-excuse-for-a-blanket again. I feel like an old married couple when I ask Sasuke, "Ready for bed?"

I expect a snide remark, but he just nods his head and crawls over to me, where we slept last night. Not that he had to crawl very far.

He lies down next to me, so I follow suit. I drape the skinny foil blanket across our arms again. I turn to my side, facing away from Sasuke, but I don't feel him shift. He's still lying on his back. He never sleeps on his back—at least he hasn't while we've been out here.

I roll onto my other side to face him. "What's eating ya, teme?" He's staring at the orange rubber ceiling, closes his eyes, and… cries. Not a whimpery, sniffling cry, but a soft, subtle line of a tear falls down to his ear. One after the other. His arms come up and cross over his face as if to hide the evidence of the fact that he has a soul. He takes the softest sniff through his nose.

"Oh, Sasuke…" It fucking kills me to see the sea break someone as stoic and cool as this man. I reach over him and wrap my arms around his torso. "God dammit, come here." He quickly wipes his eyes with his shoulder's sleeve and turns to hug me around my neck.

Sasuke's beautiful voice cracks when he says, "This is it, isn't it? We  _are_ going to die out here."

I press my cheek against his. "Sasuke, don't," I whisper.

"Naruto," he says shakily. "I'm not ready to die yet." And my heart breaks. "I don't want to die out here." This is all my fucking fault. Sasuke didn't want to go. I should have went with his gut feeling rather than thinking he didn't want to go just because Sasuke was being Sasuke.

"Hey, hey listen to me," I say softly. I start stroking the back of his head. "It's only been a few days. They won't give up the search yet, trust me. And we still have a few days' worth of protein bars…" I don't mention our dying water supply. "We've got each other and I'm not going to give up, and I'm sure as hell not going to let you give up. We're in this together, okay?" I murmur. "You are not alone right now. You have me here." His hands clench the back of my shirt and I pull the shitty blanket around Sasuke's back.

We're in this together.


	3. Day 4-5

Again, I awaken to Sasuke staring out the front of the raft. I silently scream as I reach the end of my yawn with my arms so high they smack the top of the tent. I throw the foil blanket to the side of the raft to give us, what, an extra three feet of room? This is just sad.

I run my hands through my hair. "Oi, Sasuke," I start. He turns to look at me. That exhausted, sunken face greets me again. "God damn, dude. You need some rest. Did you not sleep very well again last night?"

"I'm fine." Even his voice is defeated. He sounds so beat. Never thought I'd say this, but I miss the cold-hearted shit-stain he used to be. I miss normal Sasuke. This isn't Sasuke. I reach for our bag and look at our dwindling supply of protein bars. I grab a couple and hand one to Sasuke. As he picks up his hand to grab it, I realize how much energy he's lacking already. It's only our fourth day out here and already Sasuke looks like he hasn't slept in two weeks. The stress of this situation on top of barely any food or water and no sleep… he's a mess.

He daintily takes the bar from my hand and it falls to his lap almost immediately. He looks down at it. After I finish eating the first half of my bar (I'm saving the other half for later), Sasuke is still just staring at his. I pick it up for him, unwrap it and place it back in his hand. He holds it in front of his face and after a couple seconds, starts to take small bites out of it. "You can have another one if you're hungry later, too, alright? You aren't doing too good, teme…"

"I'm fine," he repeats. It takes him, I'm guessing, around twenty minutes to eat the five-inch long protein bar. He looks better already. I pick up the jug of water and hand it to him. He obediently takes a couple gulps and hands it back to me. "Thank you," he says. That catches me off-guard a little. Sasuke never thanks anybody for anything. It sounds so weird coming from him.

I pat him on the head. "You need rest."

"I can't sleep on this thing."

"Yes you can, here I'll lie down with you and I won't move until you wake up, alright?" I see him roll his eyes because I'm babying him. But shit, if he wasn't acting like a baby I wouldn't have to baby him. Sasuke doesn't realize that the ocean is so easy for me. I feel almost as good as I did when we left the dock the first day. Of course, I'd feel better with more food in my stomach, but I'm not doing too bad, I don't think. Sasuke… Sasuke looks like he's on his death bed.

He lies down on his back with his arms behind his head and his knees in the air because he hasn't stretched his legs out. I lie to the right of him, as usual, and hand him the blanket. He uses it long-ways for himself. He relaxes his legs to lie them flat and the blanket is long enough to cover his feet as well.

"Now, get some actual sleep, Sasuke."

"I can try." He turns his body to face me and I watch his eyes close and his knees fold up.

It doesn't take very long. Sasuke finds sleep relatively easily, it seems. So why is it he's always so exhausted? Does he just wake up too often? I turn my body to face his. He looks so peaceful now. He's sure to feel better after sleeping for a little bit. I reach my hand out and run my fingers back through his bangs and glide my hand around to the side of his face. His mouth is slightly parted and I can see his perfect teeth shining behind chapped lips.

I run my thumb along his bottom lip. I've kissed these lips before. Lots of times when we were in high school. They were mostly just quick jokes that would really piss him off. I laugh to myself about it now. Wow, he would always get so angry.

One time we were sent to a birthday party because our parents were friends with the kid's parents. We had both seen the girl around town before. We didn't go to the same school or anything, and we weren't really friends with her but she had the biggest crush on Sasuke from the few times we did run into her. What girl didn't, though, right? Of course, Sasuke couldn't stand her. He hated the way she put on her makeup, hated the perfume she wore, hated how bubbly she was—everything I loved in a girl.

Anyway, at her party she was following us everywhere (mainly Sasuke, whose side I was stuck to because we only knew each other there), and Sasuke was pretty annoyed with it. I told him I had a plan and that he had to go with it so she'd leave him alone. I didn't particularly mind her following us around, but my ride-or-die Sasuke has always come first.

He seemed really reluctant, but I did the typical "no-he's-gay-and-also-my-boyfriend" thing. I held his hand when we walked and he death-gripped mine. I leaned my head on his shoulder but he would bounce it up really hard to slam against the side of my head. Haha the part I'll always remember is when this girl followed us to the snack table corner. Sasuke sighed so hard and rolled his eyes when she strolled over, so I placed my free hand around the back of his neck (the other hand was still holding Sasuke's) and pulled his face to mine. It was a long kiss. I kissed him softly and lovingly, more than once. His lips moved against mine, too, and by the time I pulled back, the girl was gone and Sasuke was red with embarrassment. No girl I've ever kissed had lips as soft as this boy's. I found myself comparing everyone I kissed afterwards to the night at the What's-Her-Name-Again? birthday party. To this day, I still wonder if I was only acting back then.

But he's probably forgotten all that by now.

Running my thumb over this man's lips now, hard and chapped from dehydration… it hurts my heart. This isn't the Sasuke I know. It's my fault things are the way they are now. We could be at home, hanging out, watching a movie or he could be doing work from home while I play video games at his place… but instead I'm taking care of him. Almost having to force him to eat, drink, and sleep.

Combing his sleek hair with my fingers, I lean over and place a short, apologetic kiss on his cheekbone. I see the corner of Sasuke's mouth turn up in the smallest smile.

* * *

I try to pass the time by myself while Sasuke catches up on his sleep. I roll onto my back and think of ways to modify our alphabet game. I come up with stories to tell him (mostly embarrassing) about my life that might cheer him up when he's awake. I try to think of how to save these last five protein bars, but I can't think of anything other than trying to increase the time between eating; that's already hard enough. I still have the other half of mine from earlier, though. I'll give the spare one to Sasuke. I look to the water jug; a quarter left.

I let out a huge sigh. Maybe if it rains we can conserve the water somehow. But it's been bright and relatively warm for a few days now, and there aren't any clouds in the sky. Oh, Sasuke. What are we going to do?

* * *

It turns to night and Sasuke is still asleep. For a second I think he's dead and have to put my ear next to his mouth to make sure he's still breathing. Which he is. He's okay. His bangs are flopped to one side, probably from when I was playing with them, and one of his arms is stretched out as if he's limply raising his hand. His skin is so pale and smooth… how can someone with hair as dark as he has have no excess body hair whatsoever? I lightly brush his bangs to the side some more with my fingers. I feel so coarse compared to him. I run a tan finger over one of his eyebrows. Even these… almost no hair out of place.

I look out the front of the raft. The moon is absolutely brilliant tonight. Full, bright, and beautiful. For a moment I think of waking Sasuke to share this moment with him and give him a little hope that there's still good in Mother Nature, but who knows when Sasuke will be able to sleep like this again? I'm going to let him take advantage of this.

I know it may sound selfish, but I'm glad I have Sasuke here with me. Granted, I wish we were under better circumstances, but I wouldn't want to be with anyone else in this situation. He's my best friend. I can hardly even stand being awake while he's asleep because it's so lonely. I wonder if he's dreaming, I think as I eat the other half of my protein bar and discard the wrapper to a corner of our raft.

When we were in middle school we used to stay the night at each other's houses all the time. Sasuke was a huge sleep-talker. I used to mess with him a lot and have conversations with him that he wouldn't remember. "Right, Sasuke?" I say, barely above whisper.

"Hn," Sasuke groans. Oh shit.

I lean closer to him and whisper, "Sasukeeee, guess who?"

"Mmm."

I sit up on my knees with my hands in my lap. I lean down to his ear. "Guess who, Sasuke?"

"Naruto…"

"Good job, Sasuke. So where are we going?"

"To hell," he mutters.

"Well, close enough," I say as I laugh to myself.

"Where's the remote?" he babbles.

I decide to play along. I really shouldn't because he used to have a tendency of waking himself up in the process, and he needs to sleep. I go ahead anyway. "Where did you last leave it?"

"In… the living room. I don't need a babysitter, though. I'm twenty-four."

I start laughing again. He calls  _me_  a dobe? "Who says you need a babysitter, teme?"

"Mom. She doesn't get it…" he mumbles. My heart comes up my throat. I already don't want to play this anymore. He rubs his face against his bicep. "She told me not to get on the boat."

I start choking up. "What boat, Sasuke?"

"Yours."

My stomach sinks. "Why would she tell you not to get on my boat?" I know why.

Sasuke's sleepy voice gets very quiet. "Were you there? I'm sure she would be alive if you could have looked after her…"

Is that why he can sleep so well now? Because I'm watching over him? Sasuke's mom died when we were kids. She went sailing with some of her friends and she drowned in the middle of a bright, sunny day.

He said he was over it, but I should have known this is why he's so afraid of boats. And even when I went back to get the emergency bag when our boat first sank, Sasuke was begging me not to go back to get it… Is this why he felt so strongly?

Water is beginning to fill my eyes. "Your mom loves you very much, Sasuke," I choke out. I stare down at my fists in my lap and my eyes close tight, trying to prevent the tears from coming. How could I cause my best friend this much pain? How could I ignore something like that? A cold palm suddenly finds my cheek.

"I know." Sasuke says in a clear voice. I look into his open, dark eyes. He looks serene. His eyes seem accepting. I lean down and hug the absolute shit out of him (gently of course). I feel his arms embrace me. A moment later, I lean back to look into his eyes again, but they're closed. His bangs are sprawled out across his forehead. His arms fall to the floor of the raft.

He's still asleep. I grab one of his hands and bring it to my face. I give it a long puckered kiss and set it back down until I close the raft's flap and lie next to Sasuke to get some shut-eye myself. I grab his hand again and lace our fingers together. And with the image of Sasuke's beautiful mother in my mind, I drift off to sleep.

* * *

I awaken like the other few mornings—yawning, stretching, and seeing Sasuke already up and staring out of our raft door. I immediately remember the conversation I had with sleeping Sasuke last night and I'm worried he will have remembered it. But to my pleasure, Sasuke turns around with a refreshed face and his regular attitude, "About time you woke up, dobe. You've been sleeping forever." I don't think I've ever smiled so big in my life. I knew all he needed was sleep.

I immediately lunge forward and give him the biggest hug of his life. He yells at me to get off but I don't listen. My Sasuke is back. The dark circles are gone for the most part, his eyes aren't bloodshot, and he's a usual ass. Wow.

"Seriously, get the fuck off." I keep my grin as I release my grip.

"You seem to be doing better, teme! Ready for breakfast?" I joke. I pull out a couple protein bars. Three left.

I hand one to Sasuke and he snatches it from me. We unwrap our gold together and I break half of mine off to save for later. Sasuke eats the entire thing. I glance up at his hair.

"Nice bedhead."

"Shut up," Sasuke snaps. I know he cares though because he tries to straighten it out with his hand. "I wish I could take a fucking shower," he adds.

I suddenly get an idea. It's stupid, but God dammit, I'll take it. I pull my shirt off over my head and lean back in the raft to push off my pants.

"Hey, what the hell—" Sasuke says, shocked.

"I'm washing off! You don't have to look. But I know you want to," I tease with a wink. Watching Sasuke blush is the most satisfying feeling. He looks away as I slip off my boxers, toss all my clothes into the corner, and dive out the front of the raft.

As expected, he calls after me. "Naruto! What the fucking hell do you think you're doing!? You're going to get swept away by a current! Or this raft will be and you won't be able to catch up!" Thanks for believing in me, asshole.

God, it feels so good to rinse off, even if it's in saltwater full of fish shit. My legs are happy to finally be getting some exercise, too. I wish Sasuke would lighten up and get in when I'm done. I want at least one of us to stay with the raft. I swim around on my back next to the raft and Sasuke avoids looking at my naked body. So respectful. It's not even like we haven't seen each other naked before. Who cares?

"Can you get back in the raft now?" Sasuke half begs from inside the raft, which is seriously like six feet away.

"Nahhh." I wash my hair a little, if you can call it that. I stretch my legs by swimming around some more before I decide I should probably get back in the raft before Sasuke starts crying.

Thanks to me, there is water absolutely everywhere now. Not that it really matters; the sun will dry it all up as long as the raft is kept open.

"Your turn, Sasuke!" I say, still naked. I'm waiting to dry off before I put my clothes back on.

"Yeah right, I'm not getting in there!"

"Oh c'mon, it's actually really nice. Unless you want me to start calling you 'Stinky Sasuke' you better get your ass in there." He scowls at me. "I'll hold your hands and you can just be right outside the raft's opening, okay?" Sasuke groans. I reach over to him and start pulling off his shirt.

"Hey! I'll do it myself! God damn!" He pushes me away and starts to undress, but I don't have Sasuke's manners, so I stare the whole time. Sasuke doesn't get as flustered when I stare as he does when I'm undressing. I'll never understand him. After his clothes are all off, he slowly starts lowering himself into the water off the side of the raft. "It's too cold!"

"Quit being a pussy, just jump in."

"No!"

"Sasuke, come onnnnn," I plead. And that does it. Or, maybe he just slipped. Either way, he's totally soaked in the water now and he's super pissed about it.

"Here," he pouts as he holds out a hand for me to grab onto while he washes himself with the other one. He runs his hand through his hair and around his face. "That does feel really nice…"

"What'd I tell you?!"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna tread water a little so my legs can feel less cramped up."

For a good ten minutes I hold onto both of Sasuke's hands while he just kicks his legs underneath him. Then he dunks his head under one last time before climbing ass-naked into the boat with me. I'm mostly dry now, I could get dressed whenever, but I like this better than with clothes on. Besides, now the raft has water in it from Sasuke and if I get dressed my clothes will get wet.

We end up just sitting with our knees up to cover our dicks, not that it really matters, but it's what Sasuke is doing so I'm just copying him.

"Felt nice, huh?" I ask.

"Yeah it did. Now I need a toothbrush." He'll always find something to complain about, shit.

"I know. I've just been using my finger as one every day, but the saltwater doesn't make my teeth feel that clean," I say.

"Same here," Sasuke replies.

I like this usual conversation we're having. It's making things seem a lot more normal.

"I came up with a better version of the alphabet game," I tell Sasuke. He looks intrigued. "Okay, we do what we did last time, but we have to repeat everything the other person said first, then say our word. Same rules, but now if you can't remember a word, you lose. So with animals, I would say 'Ape' you would have to say 'Ape, Bat,' and I would say, 'Ape, Bat, Cougar', got it?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sasuke says.

So our game begins.

I say, "We'll start with colors. Apricot."

"Apricot, Brown," Sasuke says.

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson," I say.

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson, Dun," says Sasuke. What the fuck is dun?

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson, Dun, Ebony."

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson, Dun, Ebony, Fuchsia," Sasuke says. Why is he so fast?

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson, Dun, Ebony, Fuchsia, Green," I say.

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson, Dun, Ebony, Fuchsia, Green, Hazel." I know I'm about to be doomed.

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson, Dun, Ebony, Fuchsia, Green, Hazel, Indigo," Sasuke says quickly.

"Apricot, Brown, Crimson," I'm trying to think of something, "Dun, Ebony, Fuchsia," I'm done for. "Green, Hazel, Indigo…" Sasuke's too good at these games. "Fuck, I don't know."

"Jade," Sasuke says within half a second.

"God dammit, why are you so good at these games?" I pout.

Sasuke leans in close to me. His mouth rests next to my ear and I can feel his warm breath on my skin as he whispers, "Because I'm not a dobe," and leans back with a smug grin. "Let's do furniture," Sasuke suggests.

I groan as over-exaggeratedly as I can.

"Armchair," Sasuke starts.

"Armchair, Bed."

"Armchair, Bed, Couch."

"Armchair, Bed, Couch, Dresser."

"Armchair, Bed, Couch, Dresser, End Table," Sasuke says. I would have never figured anything out for 'E', I'm glad it was Sasuke's letter.

"Armchair, Bed, Couch, Dresser, End Table, Futon."

"Armchair, Bed, Couch, Dresser, End Table, Futon, Garbage Can." What the fuck, I don't get it. How does he come up with these?

"Armchair, Bed, Couch, Dresser, End Table, Futon, Garbage Can, Headboard," I say. I am so proud of myself right now, alright.

"—Garbage Can, Headboard…" I'm cringing with excitement. There's no way Sasuke will come up with anything for—"Infant Bed."

"Sasuke, what the fuck!?"

"I win," he boasts with his haughty grin again. He's too smart for his own good.

We play our game for what seems like hours and it doesn't get old. I've only won once and it wasn't really an "official" win because Sasuke was yawning so he took too long to answer.

We're both dried off along with the inside of our raft by the time we stop playing, so we dress ourselves. I watch Sasuke the whole time, hoping he'll catch my gaze, but he doesn't. He ruffles his hair once he's fully dressed and finally catches me staring at him.

"What?" he asks accusingly. He has the harshest glare.

I'm so glad he's back. I pick up our pitiful water jug. "Thirsty?" I hold it out for him.

"Thanks…" He only takes a couple tiny sips before twisting the cap back on and giving it back to me. My mouth is so dry. I take a couple sips, as well, and it's like I'm not even drinking it. It's just being absorbed into the walls of my mouth. Either way, it feels amazing.

* * *

By the time it's night, Sasuke is huddled up into himself. Tonight is  _really_  cold. I closed the raft door about an hour ago, if I had to guess a time. Our teeth are chattering and we're trembling and we don't even talk as I move closer to him. We lie down holding each other and shivering together. I pull the foil blanket over our arms again and reach over Sasuke to tuck it underneath his back and he does the same for me. We're like a burrito. As he pulls himself back from tucking the blanket underneath me, his cheek glides against mine and the tips of our noses touch. I want to lean in and kiss him, but I'm afraid.

I never used to be afraid, I would just lay one on him all the time. In front of people, even. So why is it now that I'm suddenly nervous? Is it the intimacy of our situation? Sasuke isn't moving away. Our noses are still touching and his eyes are fixated on mine. I rub a hand up and down Sasuke's back, trying to warm him up a little more. His hands move up from my back to wrap around my neck. My heart is beating out of my chest. My shivering from the cold is turning into shivering in anticipation. He moves his face closer, and closer… I feel his warm breath on my mouth and a second later he places a gentle, chapped kiss on my lips. He doesn't say any words. He dips his head down so my chin rests on his forehead.

What are you thinking, Sasuke? It's so hard to read you...

But for once, Sasuke sleeps through the entire night, and I awake before him in the morning.


	4. Day 6-7

I awaken still holding a sleeping Sasuke. His arms are still around my neck and his head is dipped low so I feel his warm breaths on the part of my chest not covered up by my shirt. I hold him tighter against me. It's perfectly warm here with him and honestly, I would stay here forever if I could. I feel his shoulder blades through the back of his shirt. My hands run up and down Sasuke's back. He's so lean. I gently bring Sasuke's head over my shoulder so I'm hugging him in his sleep. "Hmmm…" I sigh. The smooth skin of his neck touches my face and I feel myself falling back to sleep already. Sleeping like this, holding Sasuke so close to me… I've never experienced anything like this. I won't let anything happen to you, Sas. You're going to be alright.

* * *

I wake up again when Sasuke uses his hands against my shoulders to push himself away from me so he can stretch. I open my eyes so slightly, just to watch what Sasuke is doing but still appearing asleep. I'm sure he's just woken up; he rubs his eyes with his hands and leans over to open the flap of the raft and ties it into place. He comes back to where I am and tucks the blanket around me. Does he do this every morning when he wakes up? He stares out to the open water as usual. I hear him exhale. My impaired spy-vision sees Sasuke turn his head to my direction. He pats my leg and says, "We're  _still_  stuck out here. There's  _still_ nothing but ocean…" I continue pretending to sleep. He turns back to face the sea. "Still… Fuck, there's still nothing…" I wonder how long I should keep this charade up.

Over the course of about an hour, I learned a couple new things about Sasuke. For one, he loves to whistle. And he's really good at it. He whistles a shit ton of songs from movies and the radio and old songs that he and I used to listen to back in school… It makes him more beautiful to me.

I've also learned Sasuke talks to himself quite a bit. Not about random things, mostly things he's worried about. Like right now, he's mumbling about how much water we have. So he has been paying attention. He's mumbling about what if we do find land, where are we going to go for shelter? What will we eat? How will we find clean water? I'm not surprised when he brings up things related to survival, but I'm really surprised when he brings up people. "What are our families thinking? Do they have any idea where we are? My brother has to be going crazy…" He lowers his voice as if he doesn't want to say it, but it comes out anyway. "Minato has to be so worried about Naruto… I should have said I wanted to go back. I had the chance." He holds his face in his hands. "God, I should have taken it." Oh no, he's blaming himself? Fuck, now I feel ten times worse. I see him turn towards me. Sasuke crawls back to his sleeping spot to my left and sits facing me. I close my eyes all the way just in-case he's close enough to see through my pretense now.

His cold hand touches my face. His open fingers move their way up into my hair, where he softly ruffles it. He moves to take a seat against the back of the raft to stare out the opening while he scratches my head. It feels fucking amazing. Like my mother used to do when I was a child. It gives me pleasured shivers now that Sasuke is doing it. This goes on for a while. I decide to take advantage of the fact that Sasuke thinks I'm still asleep and I slowly move to hug his thigh. At first he tenses up and holds still for a few seconds. His hand stops scratching my head and the muscles in his leg tighten. "Are you awake?" he asks. I don't say a word. He relaxes and things go on as they had been.

It doesn't take very long for me to fall back to sleep again. It's just one of those days I can't wake up for good, I guess. When I wake up a third time, Sasuke is lying next to me. I don't pretend to be asleep anymore, because if I'm being honest, I forget about all that for a minute or two. My arms are encircling Sasuke's body instead of just his leg now. He's looking away from me. I take a deep breath in through my mouth and rub Sasuke's body up and down while I yawn. He turns to look at me.

"About fucking time. You've been sleeping for half the day," he scowls. But after everything I secretly overheard earlier, I'm sure it's just an act of his usual personality.

"Hehe, sorry, Sas. Didn't mean to make you feel so lonely."

He blushes and looks away with his pouting face. "I was not lonely."

"Yeah whatever. Did you eat anything yet?"

"Yeah, I ate a bar and drank a little bit of water. Here," Sasuke says as he tosses me my own protein bar. "What do we do about the last one?"

"It's for you. I ate two the first day we were out here so that one is yours."

"Hm."

I eat half of the protein bar and save half for later like my usual routine. For a long time we just sit and stare at the water. I decide to try to get Sasuke into one of his extremely rare, cheery moods so I start singing. I'm sure it'll just piss him off, though. Fun for me either way.

"A heart… full… of love~." I glance at Sasuke. He's glaring at me already. I know he knows this song. I continue. "A heart… full... of song—I'm doing everything all wrong—~"

"Stop right now," Sasuke threatens.

I increase my volume. "Oh, God, for shame! I do not even know your name~" He is stabbing me with his eyes. "Dear Mademoiselle," I gesture to scowling Sasuke. "Won't you say? Will you tell?~" He looks a little defeated and sighs. I whisper, "I won't tell anyone," and wink at him.

"Shut up, dobe, I don't sing." Yes you do. I've heard you in the shower before.

I place my hands at the corner of his mouth and change my pitch to a much higher one. "A heart, full of love~" I begin to sing the woman's part of the duet as I move Sasuke's mouth with my fingers. I feel tenseness in the muscles lining his lips under my fingertips; he's trying not to smile. "No fear, no regret~"

I move my hands—one on my chest and the other dramatically in the air. "My name is Marius Pontmercy!~" I sing lower, adding in the accent.

My hands quickly move back to Sasuke's mouth. "And mines, Cosette!" I sing horridly.

"Cosette! I don't know what to say~" I sing deeper.

"Then make no sound~" I sing in Sasuke's place.

"I am lost~" I bring my hands up to the corners of his mouth again, preparing to move his lips for him.

He grins and instead, grabs my hands and laces our fingers together. "I am found~" his cool voice sings. Not even close to a womanly voice, but still so,  _so_  fucking beautiful. I keep hold of one of Sasuke's hands and tighten my fingers. He does the same. I look at him and show a genuine smile, which he returns. And he doesn't do one of those 'Sasuke grins', it's a genuine, stunning, full-teeth smile. Those teeth are perfect. I wish he would show them more often.

I sit up, still holding his hand, and make my way over to him—a whole foot away. His back connects with the floor of the raft. His bangs fall to the side of his face and seeing his bare forehead gives him a child-like appearance. I lean my body over his, pushing our connected palms down to the right of his head. We're both still smiling and I can't resist anymore. I'm sorry if this isn't what you want, Sasuke. I lean down and kiss him fully on the mouth. My left hand holds the side of his face and his right one finds the back of my neck. I'm immediately taken back to that damn birthday party. Sasuke kisses so sweetly; his lips move so gently. This is what I've been craving. This is what has been missing with all those other people since that time. I kiss him back with all the love I'm getting from him. I lick his lip absent-mindedly and before I know it our tongues have bumped into each other. There's so much moisture in Sasuke's mouth somehow. This wonderful man… I end the deep kissing and peck him all over his mouth to his jaw to his ear. I smile as I lick and kiss his ear for two seconds before he starts flailing his head side to side while wearing a huge grin. Hehe Sasuke's ticklish. He laughs and pushes me off of him, "Haha, okay, enough of that," he says with a smile.

All I can do is stare at him as he wipes the wetness from his ear with his hand. What a lovely human being he is.

* * *

Sasuke's happiness doesn't last forever, though. Within a couple of hours he's back to his typical sour attitude. I'm sure it's only because he's worried. I don't hold it against him or anything. We probably only have a few mouthfuls of water left now, and only Sasuke's remaining protein bar sits in the emergency bag. I wasn't expecting to be out here for a week. I wish someone would find us. I wonder how long they'll look before we're presumed dead.

As it grows dark, I'm pretty down in the dumps. Nights out here have been bringing the worst out in me. Sometimes, it's hard being the optimistic one. Sasuke is the pessimist, so of course being happy and hopeful is my job but... look at our situation. I know there have been people who have survived months adrift, but they have all been alone. Sure emotional support is great. I love having Sasuke here… but our supplies would have lasted twice as long if one of us weren't here. I wonder how Sasuke would have done by himself on this raft. I don't even think he would have lived this long without me here. The stress was too much for him—he needed me. However, Sasuke seems fine with it all now. Maybe he's accepted it. At least the shock part of our situation has worn off.

I eat the rest of my last protein bar and lie on my back. I glance to Sasuke. He's still sitting in his usual spot in front of the raft opening, staring out. There are still no clouds in the sky. Good and bad thing; no water for us, but at least we know it won't storm right away.

I'm zoning out, so I'm startled when Sasuke says, "Naruto, look." I desperately hope for a ship. I'm getting worked up and anticipation is filling me but when I scoot to the front, nothing is there. It's just ocean. I look at Sasuke's face, and follow his gaze to the sky. The stars are so bright. So it the moon. Just like the night Sasuke slept so well. I wanted to share this moment with him before, and I'm glad he wanted to share it with me now.

"It's beautiful…" I mutter. I glace to Sasuke who is already looking at me with a grin. Awh. I feel at home in the day, and I guess Sasuke's place is the night.

We sit in silence until I tell Sasuke I'm going to lie down to get some rest. "I'll come, too," he says. He closes the raft's flap, grabs the foil blanket, and drapes it over our arms as he finds his place next to me. It's a little chilly but nowhere near as cold as last night. We sleep as we used to with our backs touching, and Sasuke doesn't say another word before I fall asleep.

* * *

As I wake up, something is very strange. I feel still. There are occasionally small crashes of water against the back of our raft. I'm almost too afraid to open the raft door, but when I do, I'm immediately crying. I turn to Sasuke (who is surprisingly still sleeping), grab his shoulders, and shake this absolute shit out of him.

"Sasuke! Sasuke! Wake the fuck up, you bastard! Holy shit!"

He's pissed. "What the fuck?! Am I on a schedule!? Don't do that you—" I see him glance out the front of the raft. His eyes widen and are immediately teary, too. He throws the blanket to the side and scrambles out of the raft…

And onto the beach.

I instantly follow him and we fall to the sand together. We hold each other as we laugh and cry and scream; this could not have happened at a better time. We roll onto our backs and just cry. I don't know if it's because we're in a new situation or because we still don't know how we're going to make it or if we're just happy to be safe from the ocean, but we cry and cry. After a few minutes we find that we're so dehydrated our crying loses its tears. I roll over to Sasuke and hold him again. I can't even imagine the relief he is feeling.

I stand up and hold out my hands to Sasuke to help him up, too. I quickly notice our raft is leaving us because most of the weight is now jumping around on the beach so I run to get it before it's lost forever along with the rest of our emergency supplies. That's twice I've had to chase after that damn bag. I drag it onto the beach and look behind Sasuke. It's just beach and trees. Very dense trees.

"Is that jungle, Sas?" I ask. Sasuke looks behind him.

"God dammit," he starts. "That's going to be a bitch to go through." Can't say I disagree with him.

"Well where should we start?" I wonder out loud. I glance to Sasuke who has already found a nice spot in the sand looking out to the ocean.

"Fuck you, you giant asshole puddle," Sasuke mumbles. He holds out his middle finger to it.

I joke, "Haha would you rather be in the jungle then?"

"I want to fucking go home," he sighs and falls backwards so the sand engulfs his sides and hair.

"Me too." I sit down next to Sasuke and enjoy the bright day on the beach with him. In a different situation, this might be nice.

* * *

We lay heavy rocks inside the raft's interior so it won't float away even if the tide rises. Sasuke and I get the knife from the duffle bag and head into the jungle to see what's up. The black shirt Sasuke is wearing has the sleeves all the way rolled up, as well as the sweatpants. It isn't that hot, I wonder if he's alright.

"We need to look for water first," Sasuke declares.

"Obviously," I agree. We make sure to stay on low ground and not head up any significant hills since water runs down. The most we wound up finding was little puddles in exotic leaves, which we gladly took turns slurping up.

"Hey, Sasuke, do you think we—"

"SH!" He harshly hisses. "Look," he whispers.

"I don't see anything!"

"God dammit, be quiet, idiot!" he whisper-yells between his teeth. "Look up there." He points up to a crook in a tree a couple yards away and about eight feet above the ground. A snake.

"You're the idiot, Sas. Snakes are deaf." Sasuke turns behind him to look at me with a face that was  _pissed_. Probably because he just hates being wrong. Maybe he doesn't believe me.

" _What_? _"_ Sasuke sneers.

"Sas, that thing can't hear sounds. It probably already knew we were coming from vibrations. I dare you to scream, it won't move."

"Fuck you, help me kill it."

"What will we do with it? Shouldn't we learn how to build a fire first? I don't want to waste it."

"Screw that, give me the knife, I'm not taking chances." I reluctantly hand the jagged-edged mini saw to him and watch him hesitantly walk towards the serpent. "Oh shit," his voice shakes out. "This bastard is big..."

"It's a Colombian boa," I state.

"How the hell do you know that?"

"I like snakes. Also Ino used to have one as a pet."

"I'm sorry,  _Ino_?"

"That's a long story, are you going to kill it or not?"

"You're damn right I am." He gets to the tree, but is about two feet short of the branch. "Make yourself useful and boost me up."

I mumble profanities under my breath as I make myself a bench for Sasuke to stand on. His sandals hurt my back. "I swear to fuck if you chicken out and drop that knife into my head—"

"Calm down, I got this." Not two seconds later, "Oh shit, it's hissing, Naruto," Sasuke chuckles nervously. I know. I can hear it.

"Be careful," I warn.

"Alright, alright," I hear him muster up the courage. "AHHH! Shit! Fuck yeah! Ya bastard! Fuck you!" I roll my eyes as Sasuke steps down and holds the limp animal from the neck. "I'm gonna eat you," Sasuke whispers to it. Poor thing. His hunger must really be getting to him.

"Awesome, let's get back and make a fire before it goes bad."

As we walk back, I pick up firewood and Sasuke cradles his trophy like it's a fucking baby. "Sasuke, I think that thing is still alive."

Immediately, without a second look, Sasuke drops it to the ground with an "oh shit". When he examines it further, he turns his scowl towards me.

"Just kidding," I smile.

"Fuck you! That's not funny." I laugh as he picks the animal's corpse back up and continues to cradle it.

* * *

When we get back to the beach, we set up the driest wood we have, and after a few matches and dried leaves from the beach, we manage to get a weak fire going. It's on the verge of night, now.

"Do you know how to clean that?" I ask Sasuke.

"No, but it can't be that hard." After about twenty minutes, we have a six-foot-long limp meat cylinder. I tried not to look, but I did and it was gruesome. But we gotta eat. I pull a couple thin sticks from our firewood pile and Sasuke yanks the guts out of the middle and pulls pieces of edible meat apart to put on the sticks. I try not to puke while I hold part of my share to cook above the fire. I can see Sasuke's mouth drooling in anticipation.

I prop mine up to cook so I can attempt to store the rest of the snake away to eat tomorrow. I hope it's still good by then. When I pick my stick back up, I glance once more to Sasuke next to me, who is staring intently at his snake and checking it for doneness every couple seconds. Guy must be starving more than me. About ten minutes later, Sasuke's stomach doesn't have to wait anymore. He eats probably a foot worth of snake in no time.

"Shit, that was so good. I'm so happy..." Sasuke announces quietly. "God I'm so happy right now." That makes me smile.

"Good, I'm glad you're happy, teme! Having food in your belly will make you more optimistic, I know it!" I'm beaming.

After I'm done with my snake, too, Sasuke and I quietly sit together and enjoy the warmth of the fire. I guess he's fine since his sleeves and pants are rolled back down. I hear Sasuke chuckle. "So you said Ino had a pet snake?"

He wants to have an actual conversation? Hell yes. "Haha yeah! Sakura dared her to get one, and you know Ino kind of turned into a badass after high school, so I went with her and we just went out and bought one from someone she found online. She took real good care of that thing, too. Named it Sir Noble Manly." Sasuke chuckled again. This is really unlike him. "What's so funny?" I smile.

"Nothing, but compared to this, I miss everything back home. Even that annoying ass friend group we found ourselves a part of."  _We._  That makes me happy.

"You really should have hung out with us more often. We always talked about you."

"What?! What'd you say?!" Ooh Sasuke's getting a little hostile. Paranoid?

"You care?" I ask. He calms immediately.

"No."

"Everyone just misses you. You're a cool guy, Sas. People notice when you're not there."

I see Sasuke blush slightly, but it might just be the fire's light. "Oh..." he murmurs. I pat him on the back.

"So what happened to Sir Noble Manly?" Sasuke questions with a grin.

"We just ate him." Sasuke blankly stares at me. "Haha, she sold him because she was moving and the landlord was terrified of reptiles. Broke her heart. She cried about it for a long time, but he lives with a breeder now, so at least he's getting laid all the time," I remark as I chuckle. I glance to Sasuke, who is gently smiling. I ruffle his hair and tell him, "I'm going to get the house ready."

"What? What are you talking about?" He questions as I stand up.

"Behold, this luxurious, five thousand square foot home," I gesture to our raft. "It is complete with five beds and four finished baths, a finished basement, theatre room, new marble counters and heated bathroom tile, perfect for any growing family. All for the low, low budget of no food or water."

Sasuke smirks. "That's cruel."

"Alright," I sigh. "How about this," I recompose myself and bring a different tone of voice. "Take a look at this glorious ten square foot raft! Complete with a hood and deflated sides! It can also double as a tent! The bright orange color will catch anyone, even a  _rescue team_ 's, eye! The flap in the front can be pulled up and tied to look out at the amazing uncharted world. Beautiful! It comes with a duffel bag full of necessities and rocks to hold it down to keep from floating away. All you need in times of trial and survival!"

Sasuke pretends to consider with his hand on his chin and a nice thinking face. "I'm gonna need a little more, here."

"This handsome man," I motion my hands to myself, "is also included. Added heat source and great comedy company."

"I don't know about comedy," Sasuke begins, "but I'll take an extra heat source. Sold." He smiles and walks over to the raft and I. The raft has been promoted to tent. We pull it a couple yards from the trees to get away from the water, throw the heavy stones outside, and get ready for another night together. We close the raft's flap and get into our usual sleeping position. Sasuke scoots his back really close to mine.

"Thank you," he mutters. I could hear a smile on his face.

"Can I get a kiss goodnight?" I tease.

"Haha, fuck you. Goodnight," Sasuke laughs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke is breaking out of his shell a little now, finally. We all knew it was just an act. (; And they finally found land! Well, landed. The song mentioned in this chapter that Naruto and Sasuke sing is called A Heart Full of Love from Les Miserables.


	5. Day 8-9

I awaken in the morning to find myself in an empty raft. When I push the foil blanket away from me, I peek my head out of the opening. Sasuke has already built a new fire and is currently cooking more of the snake on a stick. I step out and feel the warm sand on the soles of my feet. Sasuke turns around and waves me over with a grin as if I wasn't already headed to him. His messy black hair is wild; it's sticking in every direction. Although a smile is on his face and his eyes are wide and he looks so carefree, I can't help but to think it's all for show. It's out of character for him to look this happy. Maybe it's the savage in him coming out. His mood only improves with the morsel of food we've found.

Sasuke turns to me and smiles. He's going on about how there's a little more meat if I want some and we can go look for more later today. I'm sure he knows how fortunate we were yesterday; it's hard to find food in the wild. We were just lucky. He's playing a role of trying to be hopeful. Does he really believe it'll be so easy to sustain ourselves?

My hand seems to move on its own when my fingers find Sasuke's cheek. Rough. His facial hair is growing. I've known Sasuke for most of my life and have never seen even a hint of facial hair on his face. It's normally like porcelain. Sasuke quickly slaps my hand away and scowls at me—that's more like him. "Stop being an idiot, go get the last of the meat before I eat it myself."

"Can't handle a little scruff, Sasuke?" I tease.

"It's disgusting." He holds his chin in his hand and rubs his cheek. "I need to shave." I laugh at him while I feel my own beard growing. Mine's been here for a few days, though. But as long as I don't turn into Santa, I don't mind.

I move to grab the last of the meat, pull it onto a long stick, and take a seat beside Sasuke again. "I hope we don't get the shits from eating this," I laugh.

"Yeah... we probably will," Sasuke says.

"Haha," I laugh, "Sasuke, remember when—"

"Don't." He knew what I was gonna say as soon as I brought up the topic.

"Remember when we went to Sakura's party after we ate at that Mexican place and—"

"Stop." Sasuke is covering his face with one of his hands.

"Wow I wanted to puke. You blew up that bathroom hahahHAHAHA," I can't control my laughter. Sas is mortified.

"Shut the fuck up! That is so embarrassing, why are you bringing that up?!" I can hear the horror in his voice.

"You gonna cry, teme?" I tease with a sly grin. I move my face closer to his and he pushes me over. "Okay, okay," I chuckle as I push myself back up to a sitting position. I nudge Sasuke with my shoulder. "Just messing with you. It's not like anyone else is here to hear it haha."

"I don't care, I want to forget that happened." Because Sasuke Uchiha doesn't partake in disgusting things such as taking a shit, right? The ocean was our toilet for a good week and he's still trying to act cool.

"Anyway," I try to change the subject as I take a bite of the flesh that will almost surely hurt me more than help me. "Want to go look around for shit after we eat?"

"Yeah we can do that."

* * *

Exploring this time feels a lot more hopeless. We expect to find things because we did yesterday, but like I said earlier, it's all dependent on luck. I feel like we've been walking for half the day. We need more water, but it's been fairly dry since we woke up. There's not much liquid on the leaves like yesterday.

"Hey, Sasu—oh fuck..."

"What is it?" he asks. He looks generally concerned.

"I... oohhh shit, we should not have eaten that," I utter. I hold my abdomen as I crouch down. "God, hah, that hurts..."

"We should head back, come on," Sasuke remarks. A look of awareness washes over his face when he glances back to me. "You're about to go through hell, huh?" The way he said that had kind of a happy, evil glow to it.

"Oh fuck you, Sasuke. How are you not sick?"

"I'm superior, that's how." Conceited bastard. He holds out the water jug we brought along (incase we ended up finding a stream). It's almost empty now, though. I don't know how we've made it last this long.

I ignore it and continue holding my stomach. "Fu-huck you, you bastard, I—ughh..." I let out a nasty burp. I so feel nauseous. Thinking about looking for food suddenly disgusts me. Even thinking about walking is too much to handle. Anything but crouching down on the ground is suddenly too much. My face begins burning and I feel the acidity about to come up my throat. Tears well-up in my eyes as I heave and empty my stomach's contents all over the ground once, twice, and then a third time. By then nothing is coming up but stomach acid. I breathe hard a few times before I rub the water from my eyes and wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. I glance up to Sasuke who's looking at me with what I think is empathy.

Sasuke takes a deep sigh and pats my back before helping me up. "Now we've definitely got to find something huh?" he gives me a sorry grin and hands me the jug. "We'll worry about that later, though. We should get back. Your body probably needs to rest." Since when is he so sweet?

* * *

We don't find anything but firewood as we make our way back to the beach by nightfall. Food and water were not in our favor today, apparently. I feel a lot better with that animal out of my system, though. It's a wonder Sasuke's doing okay with it.

It's almost as if he reads my mind while he piles the dry sticks together to feed our newborn fire. "Feeling better yet?" he questions.

"Yeah, a lot, actually." I take a tiny swig of water. "I feel much better, thanks." He tosses the last protein bar my way.

"Go ahead, I'm not really hungry at all and you puked your meal up."

"Why are you being so sweet, Sas? Are you falling for me?" I joke with a wide smile as I unwrap the protein bar. I'm not that hungry so I'll probably just eat half.

"You wish," he replies coolly. "Shut up and eat your dinner." Sasuke takes the jug to drink only a mouthful of water. There's surely only half a cup left.

"Yes, mother," I say sweetly. After I finish half of my protein bar, I kick off my shoes and the cool night sand soothes my feet. I walk to the ocean and use my finger as a toothbrush like I have been for the past week, but I miss toothpaste so so much. Sasuke does the same before we meet back at the small fire.

We talk about small stuff. What we wish we could be eating. How we wish we were getting drunk instead. How much work it is to find our own food instead of buying some at the grocery store or ordering it over the phone. Today was pretty bland other than when I was puking my guts out.

"I think I'm gonna head to the tent raft. You coming, Sasuke?"

He doesn't look at me, but shakes his head and replies, "I'll be there in a bit." I place a hand on his head as I stand up and walk past him. The rocks seem to be getting heavier as I pick each one up to throw into the sand, and when I finally clear out the tent and lie down, I feel so much better. All I need right now is sleep.

* * *

I awaken after only, what I'm guessing was, an hour or two of sleep. Sasuke is coming in the tent, mumbling to himself like he secretly does. "Looks like it's going to rain soon. Clouds are getting pretty thick... At least we'll finally have water." I keep my eyes closed like the other day and just listen to Sasuke talk to himself. It's nice hearing his voice.

He zips the flap closed and moves the foil blanket so he can make his way underneath while muttering, "God dammit, Naruto, you're always hogging this thing." Haha, whoops. It's a pleasant surprise when Sasuke scoots closer to me and wraps his arms around my torso. His head tucks between my neck and shoulder and his fingers run up along my back which makes me noticeably shudder. Sasuke gasps in surprise but I reach my arms out to hold him close to me.

I hear Sasuke breathe a sigh of relief and whisper, "Haa you asshole," and grab the back of my thin shirt.

I chuckle and murmur in a half-sleepy voice, "Goodnight, Sas."

"Goodnight."

* * *

It isn't hard to wake up. Sasuke was right. Rain is throwing itself into the side of our tent. I don't think it'd be a good idea to look for food today in this weather. We're still holding each other. I think Sasuke's awake though, because his breathing isn't too steady. "Good morning, teme," I test.

His tired, pale face looks to mine. "Oh, good morning. When did you wake up?"

"Just now," I yawn as I rub my eye with one hand. "What should we do today?"

"Dunnoe..." Sasuke reaches his bare, slender arm to open the raft's flap a little bit so he can peek out. "Guess we can set these up so we can collect some water." His warmth leaves me as he gets up, takes the foil blanket from me, and picks up the water jug. He goes outside and is soaked right away by the rainwater. He walks to the line where the beach meets the trees to place the jug and the foil blanket (neatly folded into a bowl to catch the water) in a good position to catch the rain. He digs a deep hole in the sand for the foil blanket to stay upright. Sasuke makes one for the jug, too, but nowhere near as deep. He heads into the trees for less than a minute and emerges with a pretty big leaf. He twists it like a funnel and sticks the small end into the water jug to catch as much water as possible.

"Oi!" Sasuke yells. "Pull that raft up here too, incase the tide rises!" I frown. I don't want to get out. It's a nice temperature in here and I'm cozy. But I gotta do what I gotta do. I get out in my undershirt and boxers (the rain is fucking cold) and pull the tent all the way up the beach to Sasuke, who immediately jumps back in. I follow suit. We laugh and take off our shirts so they can dry.

"Guess I don't need to wash now," I joke.

"Yeah right, you always smell," Sasuke comments.

"Uncalled for." I scowl at him before we both break a smile. I'm glad I have his company.

* * *

Well, I should say I'm glad I have his company when I'm not feeling hot. I haven't touched myself in over a week and it's getting difficult. I'm not usually noticeably turned on but I definitely feel it every once in a while. I wonder if Sasuke's going through this, too. I know he has hookups from time to time at home, but I'm not sure if masturbating is something Sasuke does very often. Should I ask him? Although today may be one of the worst days I've chosen because we're hanging out in our tent the entire time it's raining, I feel like I can't hold it anymore. I want to be touched—by myself, by a woman, by Sasuke, I don't care. Thinking about it is making the hard-on in my shorts more noticeable than usual. I place my hands in my lap to hide it.

Sasuke is lying on his back with his hands under his head, just staring up at the ceiling of the tent. Wonder what's on his mind. "What are you thinking about Sasuke?"

"Hm?" He stares at me and I almost repeat myself before he answers, "I'm thinking about eating a nice dinner from the hibachi grill if we get back home."  _If_. That breaks my heart.

"We'll get back. I swear if it's the last thing I'll do, I'll get you home, Sasuke, don't worry." I move from sitting to lying on my side to face him. Maybe I can smooth my way into the conversation I really want to talk about. I know it isn't a topic that should be coming up right now and he probably doesn't have the energy for sexual endeavors in the first place, but I can't help it.

"Stop trying to act all heroic," he sneers. "Maybe we will, maybe we won't. I've come to terms that I'm half-dead already."

"Sasuke, no. Stop talking like that. If you think that way, you'll lose motivation for getting home."

"Hm." He stops talking to me. I continue looking at the side of his beautiful face. The scruff on his face is only a tad longer than yesterday. He doesn't look like regular Sasuke with it. The marble statue appearance is much harder to pull off with facial hair. I reach out and rub his cheek to feel it again. "Stop that," he demands. I don't though, and he doesn't force me to quit. I slide my palm down to the side of his neck farthest from me and rub his jawline with my thumb. His head turns to me and his dark eyes meet my blue ones as I slowly lean in for a nice kiss on the mouth. Sasuke doesn't move his hands from under his head; he is only touching me with his lips on mine. When I pull away slightly, he quietly asks, "What was that for?"

Instead of answering him, I kiss him again. I give his lips my undivided attention. They're slightly chapped but not as bad as when this raft was in the middle of the ocean. I'm sure mine are worse, but the hardness doesn't change how gentle his kisses are. He kisses my mouth, then my top lip, then bites my bottom lip as gently as possible before licking it with the very tip of his tongue. We part for a split second before his tongue is in my mouth. Sasuke leans up on his side and holds my face with one hand while our kissing becomes frantic. Eventually, he is sitting all the way up with me, making his way to sit in my lap agonizingly slowly. I reach under his ass and pick him up to place him on my thighs. His feet are flat with his knees in the air at either side of me. I can't get enough. I need these lips all over me. I break for a second to pull off my shirt, and Sasuke doesn't seem to mind. He quickly glances up and down my torso before holding my face and kissing me some more. God, what is he thinking? We kiss like that for a good fifteen minutes at least. His hands eventually move to my bare back and pull my naked chest to his clothed one.

I move my mouth from his lips to his neck, where I gently suck and kiss repeatedly. When I hear a, "Nngh,  _ohh..._ " come from his throat I know I'm doing something right.

"Sasuke..." I say his name as I glance from his eyes to the growing bulge in my pants. I'm slightly embarrassed for some reason.

"Hah, idiot... kissing you is fine, but should we really be doing all that?" the words leave Sasuke's mouth breathlessly.

"Why not?" I quietly suggest. The thought crosses Sasuke's mind for half a second before he sadly shakes his head.

"I don't know, dobe," he says. He kisses my lips fully for a few long seconds while holding my face. "Not sure if I'm the type..." he murmurs softly against my lips. "And I don't really have the energy." Excuses. Not the type but willing to make out with me. He's just trying not to hurt my feelings, probably. Kissing is a lot less than sex. But my boner is not gonna go away if he keeps this up. Still straddling my lap, Sasuke grinds forward one good time and I moan.

"Ohh, fuck, Sasuke you can't be doing that," I smile in pleasure.

"Whatever," he grins and climbs off me to sit on the floor of the tent. "That was a nice way to pass half an hour. What's there to do now?" he says as if nothing happened.

I know what I'm going to be doing. "Well, if you aren't going to do anything about this," I gesture to my crotch, " _I_  have to. Don't look if you don't want to see. I'll turn around." I face the opposite wall of the tent so my back is to Sasuke.

"W-wait, what?! You are not doing that in here!" he yells.

"Yes, I am! I've been holding this for too long, I need it!" I return while pushing down my shorts to reveal my boxers.

"Naruto, please," he sounds like he's embarrassed for me. But I'm not  _usually_  shy around Sasuke and this is totally natural so...

I begin groping myself through the thin layer of fabric. I'm getting really hard. God damn... "Ohh..." I quietly moan.

I turn and glance at Sasuke's face. He is so embarrassed. His face is beaming red and he's frantic to try to make me stop. "You are not doing that in here!" he repeats. "Get out!"

"Hell no, I'm not going out there! It's freezing and wet!"

"I'm not going to sit in here while you jack off, idiot! That's gross!"

"Then  _you_  leave!"

"No!"

We sit in still silence for a few moments. Sasuke with his flustered face and his arms crossed and his eyes glued to the floor. And me with my clothed, semi-hard cock in my hand turned around glaring at Sasuke.

He changes his focus to stare me in the eyes with a hard face.

"Fiiiiiine," I groan. I pull my shorts back up and turn around so I can look at Sasuke without straining my neck. "But when it gets sunny—"

"I don't give a fuck what you're going to do, just as long as I'm not around, okay? Fucking disgusting."

"Like you never masturbate."

"Do I really look the type?" Not even a little, no he doesn't.

* * *

After a while, my boner disappears and Sasuke and I play our usual alphabet game. He wins most times, and I actually win fairly one time when the subject is 'Things Found in a Bathroom'. Speaking of which—

"I gotta take a piss. Be right back," I say as I begin to unzip the tent's opening. It's still pouring it down. Thunder has been booming for the past couple hours, as well. I brace for the chilly rain as Sasuke mumbles an 'okay' while zipping the tent shut. I make my way into the trees to find a good spot to piss where the canopy mostly shields me from the rain. It takes about five minutes to find a decent location. I unzip my pants and take a long piss. It's one of those where my whole body feels like it's emptying and a sigh of relief can't help but leave my mouth. I shake myself off and tuck myself back into my pants before I start my way back to the tent.

I can hear frogs croaking like crazy and birds chirping loud as hell. An extremely bright streak of lightning seems to be directly in front of me. Holy shit, it was seriously close. The loud crash of thunder that immediately followed... was it thunder? I glance up and it's falling. A giant limb is falling. I try to move but I can't. I'm paralyzed. At first it appears to be falling right in front of me. By the time I realize, no it's falling on top of me, it's too late. I try to jump backwards, but land on my ass, then my back, and my left leg is stabbed by the side of a gigantic tree limb. "AHHHhhh!  _Fuck_! SSSSsssss..." I glance down and see blood running along my calf and dripping into the mixture of dirt and sand. My hands are shaking as I reach out to try and push the limb off, but it probably weighs four hundred pounds, God damn... "Ughhh, unnn..." I push as hard as I can while trying to pull my leg out, but instead of pushing it off, I feel my skin being ripped open. "Oooh-ho-hoooo my Goddddd!" My adrenaline is making me panic. I need Sasuke. I need Sasuke's help.

As loud as I can I scream, "Sasuke! SASUKE!" Can he hear me? A five minute walk might be too far for my voice to carry, but I'm hoping my loudness will help me in times of trial... He won't even know what direction I went. I hope he can hear me. "SASUKE, I NEED YOUR FUCKING HELP!" I scream. I hear thunder again. There was no lightning before it, though. Within half a second I'm knocked unconscious.


	6. Day 9 (cont.)

I unzip the tent's flap to check how much water the jug has collected, and am pleasantly surprised to find it's almost full, thank God. I hold my hand out and collect a small puddle of water in my palm to drink. Mmmmm, fuck, that's good. I grin as I zip the tent's flap back shut. The rain is loud, I can barely hear myself think as it crashes against the thin rubbery walls. I have to admit, when that idiot isn't here, it's peaceful, but borderline lonely. I'll never let him know that though. I catch myself mumbling my thoughts out loud and stop myself. He's been gone longer than usual. Normally he's out and back in within a couple minutes. It  _is_ raining though, so he probably went to look for a spot where it isn't pissing it down so hard. An extremely bright flash of lightning shines through the thin fabric. That's new. Naruto and I might want to find somewhere to take shelter besides this fragile piece of shit soon. I catch myself mumbling aloud again and being conscious of my actions causes me to quit.

I hear a loud burst of thunder. Where is that dumbass at? Over the numbing sound of rain, I think I hear "—asuke" but I'm not positive. Probably just my mind playing tricks on me. "Sasuke." That time I know it's real. God dammit, Naruto, what did you do? I casually open the flap as I expect him just to want to show me something. "—need your fucking help!" My stomach sinks and my eyes widen as I rush out of our tiny home and run without hesitation. I don't know which way to go, where was his voice coming from?!

"Naruto?! Naruto! Where are you?!" I listen but don't hear anything. Oh, no. Oh, no this isn't happening. "Naruto!" I repeat. "Naruto! Naruto! Where the fuck are you?" I blindly run into the wooded area looking for any sign of my salvation. My bare feet are impaled by rocks and trip over vines and suddenly I realize I'm not able to see clearly. My vision is blurred and I wipe my eyes to realize my tears are clouding my sight and mixing with continuously falling rainwater while I continue sprinting through nature. I've lost an entire human being. Where is he, where is he, where is he!? Tears continue falling down my cheeks as I scream, "NARUTO!"

My feet move too quickly and I trip over myself and eat a mouthful of ground. I realize how alone I am without him and I realize I probably won't be able to make it without him. What am I going to do? Where can I go? I force myself to stop mumbling again as I wipe the earth off of my face and I crouch up to glance around me. I have to keep trying. I begin running again, to my right, and I fight my way through plant life which seems to grab onto me every couple of seconds. "Naruto! NARU—"

I spot him. His blond locks are a ray of light in this giant world I now feel so small in. He's unconscious. "Oh, God..." I desperately dash to him, tearing plants out of my way and continuing to cry. I immediately fall to my knees and place my ear to his mouth to check his breathing. He's alive. He's breathing. "Naruto," I pat his cheek. "Oi, Naruto!" No response. I place my head on his chest and his heartbeat seems a little quick. As I listen, my eyes widen as I see his leg being crushed by a tree... no, a tree limb. It's so large it might as well be its own organism. There is blood absolutely everywhere. I don't know if it just looks like so much blood because the rain is mixing with it and spreading it all over his leg and the ground, but either way this isn't good. I look to Naruto's face. He's uncharacteristically pale. He has a gash on the left side of his head, too. This guy... it's like the only thing that could be worse right now is if he was dead. I move his hair—wet with blood and rain—to check the size. It's not gigantic. It doesn't need stitches or anything but it needs to be cleaned and bandaged up.

I'm dreading looking at his calf but it needs to be done. I get up to try pushing the limb off but there's no way. It's incredibly heavy. I glance around and see a much slimmer branch near Naruto's head—the one that probably made him unconscious. I use it for leverage and after a few good pushes, end up lifting the larger branch. I gently kick Naruto's disgusting leg out from underneath it, and then drop the plant back down. I glance at Naruto's leg, and about six inches of his skin has been turned to shreds. For half a minute, I let the rain wash out a lot of the mess to examine it further and see he has lost a lot of blood, but he doesn't seem to have any broken bones. There's a small hole in his leg about an inch from the middle of the shredded skin. The tree limb seems to have stabbed him. Not much blood is coming from it, but it is a little torn, I'm guessing he tried to pull his leg out... God dammit, Naruto.

I place Naruto's leg back on the ground and move up to his face. I wrap an arm around the back of his torso to lift him into a sitting position. His head hangs backwards, looking totally lifeless. I hold the back of his head in my other hand and move my palm to cup his pale cheek. The sight of this strong-willed man, my best friend, totally broken and helpless at the fate of nature is unnerving. I have never felt more alone in my life as I do this very moment. If it isn't one thing, it's another. If we don't need food, we need water. If we don't need water, we need to be conscious. Fucking shit. I'm crying again. I didn't know I could still make this many tears. Muttering to myself... is this the only conversation I'll be able to have with anyone anymore?

I glance down to his leg, which is now pouring out blood like a river. Fucking shit. He's lucky I know first aid from mandatory job training after some woman had a heart attack at work. I take off my shirt and tear off the sleeves. I wrap the abdomen part of the shirt around his leg to stop the bleeding, and tie the sleeves together to make a tourniquet with a strong stick just below his knee. Bare-skinned and freezing, I move my body to support Naruto with his arm over one of my shoulders as I hold his torso and lift him with me and make our way back to the tent we call home.

* * *

I lie Naruto down in the tent, but remove the large part of the shirt from his injured leg to expose the wound to the rain to flush it out. I keep the tourniquet in place. I remove the first aid kit from the emergency bag before placing the bag outside to elevate his leg. I zip the flap shut around his leg to keep us dry.

The medical kit has everything, albeit a short dose of each, it is still definitely better than nothing. I take into account the tube of Neosporin, one of the two small packs of antibiotic ointment, fresh gauze, and medical tape before briefly opening the flap to reach outside and pull the jug of water from the sand. I remove the large leaf from the lid and then place the bloodied shirt piece under Naruto's head to act as a pillow and absorption pad so the tent isn't drowning in water.

I pour water from our jug into the cut on his head. Nothing seems to be stuck in it, debris-wise, so I take the medical scissors and trim his hair around the wound to prevent it from sticking. I slap on antibiotic ointment, gauze, and wrap it up with the least about of bandage possible to conserve it. His head should be fine as long as he wakes up. I glance to the visible part of his leg. Infection is our enemy now.

My hand moves on its own to Naruto's cheek and caresses it while I listen to myself whisper about life and death, why I need Naruto, why I wish I could apologize for getting angry about a silly situation earlier. I mutter of how I should have let him win some of those alphabet games. I'm a horrible person. I'm a horrible friend. I have prevented this, too, right? Is this also my fault?

"I'm sorry, Naruto," I quietly say as my hand holds his soft cheek. "I'm sorry this happened to you and I'm sorry if it's my fault." This man... he means the world to me. Right now he is my world. Even thinking that sentence makes me cringe from how cheesy my thoughts sound... but it's very true. We are a team. I lean my head down so our mouths are less than an inch apart. Is this wrong? I open my eyes and stare into Naruto's face as I contemplate my actions. Should I stop? Why do I always feel the need to be so physical with him? Kissing him like this... why do I suddenly crave it?

I touch our mouths together in a gentle kiss. I know he loves them like this—so soft and tender. It reminds him of the past, I think. Lovers from the past, how simple life used to be, the gentle touches of childhood, I'm not sure what specifically makes him love intimate kissing, but I'm sure it's because of nostalgia. Naruto... he kisses roughly and sometimes sloppy, but my god, what I wouldn't give to be receiving those hard kisses back. Lifeless lips greet mine as I lightly peck him a second time. The stillness of his mouth hurts me. "We're a team," I barely whisper. I kiss him a third time and touch our foreheads together. "God dammit, we're a team, you idiot."

"Sas..." My eyes shoot open and I lift my head to look at Naruto's face. I grab his hand and he murmurs in a raspy voice, "It's weird right?"

"What's weird?" I ask concerned.

"Isn't the prince normally the one to wake the princess with his kiss and not the other way around?" he smiles tiredly and if I wasn't so glad he's awake, I'd be insulted.

"Fuck you, you idiot," I say, half crying, as tears well-up again and I lean down to hold him. He wraps his arms around me. "You scared me," I cry. "God, you fucking scared me."

"Hah..." Naruto sadly laughs. "I was scared, too." I pull back to look him in the eyes. He reaches up to wipe a line of tears away from my cheek with his thumb. "Don't make a face like that, Sasuke. It's hard watching such a stoic man cry." I hold his hand against my cheek, lean down and kiss him. Connecting with him like this... he is alive. He's alive, I'm alive, and we're going to survive together. I move my lips against his and the rough kisses I'm normally greeted with are now dainty and fragile, probably because he has no energy and the amount of blood he's lost.

"I..." saying these words are important. I have to say them, but coming from my lips, they sound strange. They sound foreign. He needs to know, though. A one-eighty from my normal personality, I tell him, "I'm so glad you're okay, Naruto." He smiles really big and nods his head in agreement, before a sudden jolt of pain shows through his features.

"My leg is killing me," Naruto complains. "Why is my leg sticking outside the tent?" he glares at me as if I did something wrong.

"Flushing it out. It's not pretty. I'll go ahead and check on it." I open the flap and am bombarded by rain in my face. Looking at Naruto's leg, it looks pretty clean now. The bleeding has gone down and it seems to be free of the debris thanks to the harsh rain. "Can you move your toes?" he does. "Can you pull your leg inside?" he complies, but complains at every move. I pull the emergency bag inside, prop Naruto's foot up onto it again, and zip the flap shut.

"Ohh, fuck, that hurts!" he glances down to look at it.

"Don't look at it. You'll freak yourself out."

He looks like he's going to puke. "Holy shit..." he groans as he looks away.

"What did I tell you?" I glare at him for a brief moment before remembering the severity of the situation. I take the shirt I was using as a pillow for Naruto and pat his wound dry. He screams so loudly with each dab of the fabric. "I'm trying to be gentle, stop screaming!"

"Whatever, teme! You're trying to make me suffer!"

"No I am not!"

"Yes, huh!"

I'm about to rip my hair out. He's been awake five minutes and if I didn't think he had a concussion, I would be telling him to go back to sleep. I finish up drying the ripped skin despite protests from the idiot, and apply Neosporin to this area as well. I cover it with gauze and use the medical tape to secure it in order to save the bandage wrapping.

"Wow, Sas, you should have been a doctor," Naruto comments. I'll admit, it's flattering, but it's just basic first aid. We aren't out of the woods yet. Ha.

"You need to eat something. You've lost a lot of blood," I say turning to him.

"Oh! I still have half of my protein bar from yesterday," he says excitedly. Food always has lifted his spirits. He only has to reach a foot to find the open wrapper in the corner of the tent. "Do you want half of this half?" Naruto asks.

"Hah, no. I'm good for now, you need it," I assure as I pick up the jug of water and take a long drink. God, it's so good. After a few long gulps, I hold it out to Naruto. "Drink."

"Yes, sir." He grabs the jug and drinks more than I did, but that's not unusual and I'm glad he does. By the time we've finished, the jug is half empty and I replace the large leaf to be used as a funnel once more, and place the jug in its previous place outside in the sand outside. When I zip the raft closed again, my hair is dripping and my torso is freezing cold. It's hard to believe how unbelievable chilly the rain is.

"You need to stay awake for six hours just to be safe. You may have a concussion," I inform him.

"No, Sas, I think that's a myth or something," he contradicts. "Pretty sure I read somewhere that you're supposed to sleep if you have a concussion."

This asshole... I don't want him to go back to sleep. What if he does have a concussion and he's wrong about needing sleep? What am I going to do if... "Just stay awake," I almost beg without looking at him. When I do glance to him, he's propped himself up on his elbows and smiling at me.

"Kiss me," he half-asks. The suddenness makes me blush. Nearly every flirtatious thing he does makes me blush. Why? I never have this problem with girls. Then again, I'm popular with them. They don't care what I do or say, being attractive does the work for me. But Naruto... I think he sees past that and I feel... vulnerable?

"What makes you think I'd want to do that?" I can't even look at him.

"I dunnoe, maybe the fact that I woke up with your lips on my mouth." He's grinning. God dammit.

I crawl over to him, place one hand crossing his torso on the floor, whisper, "Fuck you," against his mouth and kiss him. I feel him grin against my mouth, which makes me grin too.

Naruto's hand cups the back of my head. "Thank you, Sasuke," he gently says. His lips are less chapped than normal after the long drink of water.

I give him a final peck and back away before suggesting, "I should find some fish for you or something. We don't need a fire to eat fish, and you're going to need more than half a protein bar..." I begin heading off but Naruto catches my wrist and pulls me back. I'm staring him in the face as he kisses me again. He's so affectionate today.

"Don't worry so much," he whispers as he pulls my lips to his once more.  _Don't worry so much_. The shock of nostalgia hits me like a punch to the gut. I experience something like  _Déjà vu_. I once attended a birthday party with Naruto, who pretended to be my boyfriend so the birthday girl would stop following me around and asking me things. We were by the snack table and he held my hand with one hand and the back of my neck with the other. He leaned in and whispered, "Don't worry so much" before kissing me exactly like this. I feel like I'm back to being the embarrassed, blushing fifteen-year-old Sasuke who was too good for a pretty girl. Still being the only one able to have this effect on me... You really haven't changed a bit, Naruto.

We kiss softly for a while. Our tongues occasionally collide and gently caress each other. The smallest of moans leave our mouths every once in a while. Naruto's hand rubs my bare side up and down slowly, eventually sliding up all the way to the back of my neck where he gently scratches my hairline. It feels so good, I shiver and he chuckles. I break from him. "I should look for food before it gets dark," I comment.

"Sure thing. Take the knife and stab you a fish, teme!" he beams. He's trying so hard to be normal Naruto, but the current tone in his voice is so soft and quiet compared to his usual demeanor. I smile softly at him, pat the side of his head that isn't injured, and make my way outside. The rain is bone-chilling, but it's better I don't have a shirt because that would only keep the cold against my skin. I notice how insanely high the tide has risen. Where once it would take 50 steps to get to the ocean, it probably takes around ten or so now. I target areas with many rocks in one place, and I do spot a few fish, but they're incredibly fast. I try stabbing them for a good ten minutes before my frustration gets the better of me. I know I shouldn't stay out here for long. I'm at risk of hypothermia or a cold, but I need to find something, anything, for Naruto to eat. I continue making my way down the shoreline, until I get to a place that would easily have been accessible if the tide hadn't risen. There's a rocky cliff blocking my way. It continues down into the forest as far as I can see.

I'm sorry, Naruto, but I don't think we'll be eating today. I shiver as I make my way back to the tent after about an hour of searching. I find some clams against rocks while walking knee deep in the ocean (the waves constantly cause me to trip up or almost lose my balance) and I pick them up. I know Naruto can't eat them. His immune system won't be able to handle them right now due to his blood loss. I pop open a few with the knife and eat them on the way back to the tent. I want to vomit but I know I need the nutrition. I'll find some more once Naruto has a little color back in his face. I decide to move to the trees and walk the rest of the way back out of the water. My feet feel like they're going to freeze off. I honestly can't remember the last I've been this cold. I spot a little rodent scurrying along the ground, but decide I can't do anything with it if I do kill it because I can't make a fire, so I watch it scamper off into the greenery.

Fire is actually going to be a big bitch for the next few days due to the wood being drenched, so I pick up a few large pieces that can share our tent with us and somewhat dry out by the time the rain stops. I realize I'm mumbling everything out loud again. I really should try to break that habit.

Before I know it, I can see the tent. It's starting to get pretty dark. I hope Naruto didn't fall asleep.

I'm pleasantly surprised when I open the tent to find an awake Naruto, just rummaging through the emergency bag. "Oh, hey teme. Find anything?"

"Just a few clams, but they wouldn't be good for you." He doesn't even question it.

"Oh okay well, here's the shit we've still got. First aid kit, obviously. Knife, obviously. We have a flashlight, a whistle, the flare gun with four cartridges, forty-three matches, and glowsticks," he says. I expect him to go on, but he doesn't.

"That's it?"

"That's it."

"Hm." Well, that honestly isn't too bad. I wish we had a rope or something. I thought we did? Maybe we lost it? Maybe I'm just imagining it. "I'm sure we can survive off of a bunch of lights, somehow." I roll my eyes.

"Oh, and we still have the foil blanket and water jug outside," he mentions as he places the bag back under his foot to continue elevating his leg.

"Yeah, we do. We'll cover the foil blanket's hole with leaves when the rain stops and use it to refill the water jug when we need to."

"Good idea, Sas," he says. He looks a little shy when he says, "To be honest, sometimes I don't actually know what I'm doing and I kind of fake it to make it." I know he does. "But without you here, Sasuke, I probably wouldn't last much longer. I wouldn't have thought of the hole in the ground or the water jug's funnel. Hell, that tree would have just flat out killed me, I would have been stuck there." He scratches the back of his head as if he's unsure if he wants to continue. "I'm really glad you're with me. As fucked up as that sounds, you're the reason I'm trying to survive and get home so badly. I want to get you home, Sasuke." Naruto sheepishly smiles and I grin as I place my hand on his head.

"Shut up and lie down," I say lightheartedly. He smiles, understanding my personality and knowing I genuinely mean well. I lie with him for hours (until we think the six hours has passed) and eventually, Naruto falls asleep first. It's hard for me to sleep again tonight. The rain still sounds as if it's trying to impale our tent. Pounding, pounding, pounding. The wind occasionally changes direction and gives a short relief from the horrid sound, but it always returns. I scoot close to Naruto, trying to give him some warmth since I did take the foil blanket to capture drinking water. My teeth chatter as I pull my abdomen close to Naruto's body. Now isn't too great a time to not have a shirt, I think. If I do die out here, I'm glad to have spent my last few days with this idiot. Again, I'm thinking out loud without realizing it and quickly shut myself up. "Goodnight, dobe," I whisper as I place an intimate kiss behind his ear.

My body anxiously chills as I feel a chuckling shudder and hear, "Hehe. Goodnight, Sas."

* * *

I wake up in what seems to be the middle of the night and I'm alone in the tent. Jesus Christ, where did that idiot go? I open the tent. It's perfectly still outside. No rain, no wind. "Naruto!" I call. He's probably just pissing somewhere, but I'd like to make sure he's okay. He doesn't answer me, though. "Naruto, where the fuck are you at?!" I yell louder. No answer.

I begin to feel uneasy and I yell his name again as I enter the jungled area. I yell his name again, and again, "Naruto! Naruto! Where are you! You better fucking come out right now, this isn't funny!"

Then I see him, taking a leak next to a tree. "Oi, Sasuke!" he waves. But I feel the color fall from my face when I see the tree falling. It's falling on top of him, and I run as fast as I can to him. I can't waste any time, I have to save him! I reach my hand out to pull him to safety, and right before the tree crushes Naruto, the one person who really  _knows_  me, my best friend, the one I care most for, I awaken, sitting straight up in the middle of the night in the real world.

I deeply gasp and feel my forehead. I'm sweating. I'm freezing and sweating and my face is wet with tears that I don't remember crying. I glance to my right and see Naruto fast asleep. I watch to be sure his body is rising and falling with life before I lie back down. My heartbeat is crazy. I can hear the  _lub-dub_  of each beat in my ears and the pulse in my own chest makes itself known while I just lie here. I cover my face with my hands and breathe in and out deeply and slowly. "My god," I quietly complain. I reach my hand out to touch Naruto to make sure it's him. He's here, he's tangible. I reach to his hair and scratch the back of his neck and head before moving my palm to gently press against the side of his neck. A pulse. He is alive. He is real. I close the gap between us again and rest my forehead at the nape of his neck. It ends up being hours before I find true sleep, and even then, I wake up for the day before Naruto does. The rain's stopped.


	7. Day 10-18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** Good song to listen to if/when shit gets dramatic is 3055 by Ólafur Arnalds. (:

 

The week has been quite uneventful. We've been inside the tent most of the time. Well, Naruto has. His leg's pain causes me to go out and find food and firewood. Water is still an obvious priority, but I never come across any. Our water supply is extremely low now, and the only food I've been able to find are a few crabs on the beach which don't last long. The walks along the shoreline have given me a bad sunburn, too. I took Naruto's t-shirt since he has the protection of the tent. I tried exploring the other side of the beach that was blocked off by the high tide, but from what I saw, it was no different than this side.

I scratch my ever-growing scruff. I've never felt more disgusting in my life. My skin is dry and falls off in large, broken flakes. My lips are always chapped. The brightness from the sun... I feel like I'm blinded every time I step out of the tent.

It's the middle of the seventeenth day now. I wonder if there are still people searching for us. I walk back to the tent with an armful of firewood. I've learned to look forward to the night, when I can feel close to Naruto. He's usually sitting in the tent because of his tremendous pain, but he scoots out of the tent and sits with me by the fire each night. We don't talk about anything in particular, but it's a nice break from being the provider. It's always seemed like Naruto's type of job—going out and killing shit to bring back, while I'd just find some stupid crabs and gather firewood. Well, I guess that is all I do anyway. He's the nature type, not me. I'm not suited for any of this.

I drop the firewood in the sand and as I enter the tent, I take a quick glimpse of Naruto. He's sheen with sweat. I see Naruto's expression quickly change from serious to happy. His smile never falters, at least when I'm around. I'd bet anything that he's only trying to keep me in high spirits. "Hey, teme!"

His smile is becoming contagious and I grin as I say, "Hey, Naruto."

"You're back early. Find anything?" he questions. He asks this every day when I return. I sadly shake my head.

"I was thinking about your leg," I confess.

"Oh, it's fine." You don't have to lie. He glances to the bandage and then looks to me. "Should probably change it again, huh?" his smile doesn't fade.

"Yeah. Yeah I'll get on it."

First, I look at the gash that was on his head. For the most part, it's healed up nicely. We don't need to put bandages on it anymore. As I hold his face downward in my hands for a better look, I can feel the sweat. His face is so hot and wet. I run my fingers through his hair. His roots are soaked.

My palm finds his forehead. Burning. He's burning up. "Oi, Naruto... how long have you been this warm for?"

"Heh, since I woke up. It's alright, I don't feel too bad." His sad laugh returns.

I'm despondently positive his fever is thanks to his leg injury. I turn to look at it and I can see the darkened skin of his foot and ankle. It's purple. It's been purple for days now.

I ready myself to remove the bandages to change them for the third time. Trying to save supplies is so... meaningless. I've only been able to change his gauze once every few days, and that's caused the wound to fester. I should have changed it every day until we ran out, dammit why am I so desperately trying to save equipment? I'm constantly tired and dizzy. I have hardly any energy for anything at all. We're down to half a jug of water because it hasn't rained once since the shittiest day on this beach. Each moment feels like it will be my last so why am I trying so hard to save supplies? If we need them now, we need them now. I wish I had gone by that philosophy sooner.

I feel myself cringe as I slowly pull the soiled bandage from Naruto's calf. The smell is sickening. Red, yellow, white, blood, and puss all greet me. My supply hording has done this... I look at Naruto's face, but he's looking away. His left leg is absolutely horrendous. I hold the sides of it in my hands. "I'm so sorry," I whisper. "I'm so sorry, Naruto, I couldn't care for you properly." My eyes are glued to this vile wound. This nauseating masterpiece I created was much more serious than it first seemed, and it's evolved into something even more deadly. Looking to his blackened foot, it's obvious it hasn't been getting the circulation it needs. That tree actually  _did_  crush an artery somewhere.

Naruto's hand falls to my head. "You did your best, Sas. Don't beat yourself up." With wet eyes I stare into Naruto's face. He's crying. Oh, fuck, I really fucked up this time. I've just ruined the outcome of the entire rest of his life a second time. Just now, and once before when I refused to go home out of pride. I should have been honest  _then_. I wanted to go home more than anything in the world; even more so now.

I look at the blistered and more-or-less dead foot. Then it hits me. Gangrene. This is the early stages of gangrene. "God dammit, Naruto," I know what I need to do to take care of his leg. I know what I have to do and Naruto isn't going to like it one bit. "I..." I want to vomit even thinking of the words. "I-I need to..." I stare into his eyes for reassurance, but he only looks confused. I close my eyes as I hurriedly say, "I have to take off your leg."

He continues to stare at me for a moment before his expression changes to a mix of offended and afraid. "Don't fucking joke about that," he voice half screams.

"I'm not joking, Naruto," I voice with a more worried tone, than serious.

"I... I need it! I can't do anything without my leg! I'll be useless here!"

"Please," I grin as I sadly stare him in the face, "You've been useless since that damn tree incident. This won't be much different."

He doesn't even try to smile, and I really don't blame him. I see him visibly shaking. "Sasuke..." he's already silently crying and staring at his leg. He knows it needs to happen. Naruto holds the sides of his knee in his hands. "I don't know what to say..."

"Doesn't matter. It's my fault and I'm so, God, I'm  _so_  fucking sorry but I'm not going to let you die. I won't let it go that far. Your leg is purple, Naruto, almost black. I'm going to cut it off."

"Right now?!" he's horrified. I don't at all blame him, I'm horrified as well. I'm the one who has to butcher my friend.

I take a deep breath. "As soon as possible," I quietly say, attempting to sound as calm as I can. I'm trying to reassure him that I know what I'm doing when really, the most medical treatment I've ever done has just brought death to Naruto's doorstep. But if I don't do anything now, he really will die. I can't hesitate anymore.

Naruto's voice starts shaking. He talks quickly and all of his words blend together, frantic and hoping the sentences they form will somehow help the outcome that is sure to come if we don't do anything. "Hah, ahh, I, uh, I don't know, Sas, what if someone comes to rescue us today and I could have gotten it saved or something and then if you amputated it woul—"

"Naruto." He stops talking immediately. "You know no one is going to be here," I reach to hold his cheek. "If someone comes and tells you they could have saved your leg, you can cut off my leg, too, okay?" That makes him smile a little. "I'm not going to fuck up anymore. I promise, it will be okay. I want to be of some kind of use to you out here. I owe you. I'm saving your life." Naruto squeezes his eyes shut tight, shedding the last tears he can manage; already mourning the loss of his leg although it's still attached. I lean forward and kiss his lips. "Trust me," I say. I kiss him again. I'm a shitty person. I know I'm manipulating his emotions like this, but I have to get him to let me amputate his leg. It's sucking the life out of him.

Naruto pulls away and hard-heartedly says, "Sasuke, you're not just dressing a wound, you're cutting off an entire piece of my body." His palms connect with my cheeks. He rests his forehead on mine and reluctantly whispers, "Please don't fuck this up." We both smile disheartened, but anxious smiles. I pat his knee and pull the hunting knife out of my belt loop from earlier. I have to find something to control the bleeding. I create a tourniquet as I did when his leg trouble first happened, using the same sleeves and a piece of firewood from outside. I knot and twist it around the middle of Naruto's thigh.

I get the last of the antibiotic ointment, bandages and dressing ready. I don't know how much he'll bleed. I don't know if I'll be able to stop it. My face tingles and stings with sadness as I silently grieve for him. He doesn't know that I'm mourning him as he is mourning his leg, because what if I really can't do it?

"I'm going to cut just above the knee," I tell him. I try to control the unusual trembling in my voice, but it's impossible. I sit up on my knees, take off the shirt I had been borrowing from Naruto, and hand it back to him. "Bite on this. I don't want you chomping your tongue off, too." He's pale. He's afraid, I know, Naruto. I know how scared you must be. I'm scared, too. But I need to be strong for you. The tourniquet is doing its job, at least. The rest of his leg is losing circulation, too.

Time feels like it's moving so slow. I lean over to Naruto's face again and give him a good, long, loving kiss. Just incase. I grab the knife as I sit to straddle Naruto's thigh. My back is facing him and I put all my weight in the middle of his thigh so it's much harder for his instincts to resist. I feel a strong hand rest on my shoulder and massage my muscles.

I feel like we've just gone down a huge hill and my stomach comes up to my throat. "Ready?" I ask. Naruto's hand squeezes my shoulder hard one time before letting go and finding itself under his ass. I turn to look and he's sitting on his hands and gagged. His eyes look so afraid—the abandoned animals one would see on those sad commercials comes to mind. He nods once and closes his eyes tightly. I breathe in and out deeply a few times. I'm not sure if anything could prepare me for what I'm about to do, though.

"Here we go..." my annoyingly shaky voice says. I wipe the knife thoroughly with an alcohol wipe from the first-aid kit and hold it over the slightly purpled area of my friend's leg, and I do it. I quickly cut into his leg and immediately want to throw up. Peering into the insides of a person, let alone someone I cherish with all my heart, is revolting. Looking isn't the worst of it; listening to Naruto's screams could cause me to puke. They are completely sickening. "I'm sorry," I say through my tears. I cut as fast and as efficiently as I can around the sides and slide the blade through skin, a thin layer of fat, and through tough muscles. I notice there's nowhere near as much blood coming out as I would have expected. "I'm sorry," I repeat. This time my voice cracks. He doesn't hear me over the noises coming out of his own mouth, though. I try to hurry it up to put him out of misery.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHH, SASUKE, STOP! STOP! HAHHH AAHHHH! SASUKE! SAS, STOP, QUIT, QUIT! OWWWUHH, HAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT HURTS! IT HURTS! I CHANGED MY MIND! STOP IT, STOP! I CHANGED MY MIND!" It's taking every fiber of my being to continue. The physical aspect of a weakened, but fully grown man thrashing around underneath me, hearing my own heart break, and feeling my stomach acid forcing its way up my throat from his blood-curdling screams, focusing on the job that I  _have_  to do right now... I'm breaking. I'm breaking. I continue slicing through the thick muscle from the top and the sides. Naruto's screaming never ceases. He grabs ahold of my bare shoulders with a deadly grip and pushes his burning, sweaty, pain-filled face into my back and shouts and cries.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" It's all I can say. It amounts to nothing, but it's the only comfort I can give him. The blood is relentlessly pouring out of his leg and I notice the tourniquet became loose from Naruto's continuous panicky jerks. I quickly toss the knife to the floor and re-apply the tourniquet. Blood is everywhere. It is  _everywhere_ : my hands, my pants, my torso, the entire tent. All this blood should be inside this man's body but it's coating the tent instead. The bleeding slowly lets up and I decide I can continue. I reach the nerve. God, Naruto, I hope you're ready. I cringe thinking about it—how much pain Naruto is about to go through even compared to what I've already done. I should just get it done, right? I try to reassure myself while agonizingly exuberant, desperate sounds blast into my ear. Just get it done. Rip it off like a Band-Aid. "Here we go, Naruto..." I lift the knife only to slam it back down so hard it lacerates through the thin nerve along with a good chunk of muscle and into Naruto's bone.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH MY FUCKING FU-HUH-HUCK, OHHHH FUCK, GOD, PLEASE STOP, SASUKE! I'M BEGGING YOU! PLEEEAASE!" His head is still forcefully pushing against my back and I bring a bloodied hand up behind me to rub the back of his head for a quick second before I continue.

"The worst of it is over now, I promise," I tell him. As soon as the words leave my mouth I know it's a lie. I slice around the rest of his flesh but now reach the main problem. I don't know what the fuck to do about his bone. The hunting knife has a serrated edge, but how long will it take? I think for half a second about making a dent in the bone and then trying to snap it apart using some kind of leverage, but I have no idea how well that would work. And if I'm being honest, the sound of a snapping bone would be more gruesome to me than all of this flesh and blood.

It might be a selfish choice, but I flip the knife to the jagged edge and position it at the top and start sawing right away. The sooner this is over, the sooner Naruto will be okay. His agonizingly tragic screams continue. Back and forth, back and forth. Powder made of bone, like sawdust, builds up as I work my way through.

My arm is absolutely exhausted by the time I'm through and the bone splits. It takes all my emotional and physical strength to cut through the rest of his flesh lying underneath his broken bone, but once it's totally separated, it's done. We're done. Naruto's body is in two pieces in this tent. I quickly empty the antibiotic cream onto the bleeding stump (to prevent infection rather than treat it), fold the skin over to touch, and wrap up the stump with the bandages and gauze. I wrap the t-shirt pieces around that, too, just incase it does bleed quite a bit more. I decide to leave the tourniquet on for at least a little while longer. The screams turn to shivers and moans of agony.

What felt like an entire lifetime of removing this piece of an actual person actually only took a few minutes. My hands are still shaking and covered in the thick, crimson juice of life. I stare at them briefly and then turn around to kiss Naruto everywhere. "You did it," I comfort. I kiss his neck and his face and his ears. "You did it," I repeat. His sweat is so salty on my lips but I don't care. He did it. I hold his cheek and neck in my hands. Blood is everywhere. Naruto doesn't have any energy. He just grins at me. I lie him down on his back to help the blood flow back to his heart instead of just downward to his wound.

Naruto looks up at me as I lean over him. "No,  _you_  really fucking did it, Sas..." he's so worn out. We still haven't won this battle, though. If his old wound was infected, chances are this new one could end up the same way. What will I do then? What if I can't save him?

I glance to the lifeless, disconnected leg. I'm going to be sick. What am I supposed to do with that? "Uh..." Stomach acid fights its way up to my mouth. "Naruto?"

He closes his eyes and sounds, "Hm?" in-between sad, pained moans.

"What, um..." This is so awkward and sad. "What do you want me to do with the leg?"

" _The_  leg? You mean  _my_  leg. Just fucking bury it somewhere, I don't care." He sounds insulted and holds an arm over his face and I feel myself being silently dismissed.

I exit the tent and pull the leg with me, gagging each time I think about having an individual limb in my hand. I take it a long way, probably a couple miles, before I lay the leg to rest in the sand. Now you'll always be part of this island, huh Naruto? No... It's more like this island has literally taken a part of you. This place has really fucked us over, hasn't it? You more than me, easily, though. I'm speaking aloud again but don't bother to stop myself. What am I going to do about Naruto now? Wait for days more? We don't have pain killers. I fucking hate seeing him in this much pain. I hate it. He may never hear it from me but he is the most important person in my life.

I look out to the sea. It's beautiful at sunset. I wish I could enjoy something like this, though, instead of worrying about health, food and water. I never appreciated nature like this back at home. Sunsets, stars, plants, the ocean... Maybe this is nature's sick, needy way of getting me to pay attention to it. I lean down and wash off my hands, arms, face, and torso in the ocean. The water dilutes the blood and small blue waves turn orange and red.

I walk back to the tent along the shore and I spot one. Not since the first night or two has any hope come, but I see it. A ship, closer than the horizon line. Of fucking course one would show up today. I'm gone. My adrenaline helps me run as fast as I can to the tent. I burst inside hurriedly and my hands continue to tremble as I dig in the emergency bag for the flare gun, cartridges, and matches. I only say, "A ship" to Naruto, which makes his eyes widen with hope and rage. Maybe we could have saved his leg today.

I scream and wave frantically and shoot the flare into the sky. I hurry to make a fire, but it's taking too long. The matches keep dying from my fumbling fingers. I drop half of the ones I light into the sand. Wasted. I'm wasting everything. I eventually get a fire going. Black smoke rises at a steady rate, and the red smoke of the flare still lingers, but when I turn back around to wave my arms, it's out of sight. The ship is gone. Hope for being rescued vanishes again. I throw the flare gun into the sand and stomp into the tent like a fucking five-year-old. God, what the fuck do we have to do to get home?

Naruto doesn't seem surprised. He just shrugs as I run my hands through his blood-stained hair. It's hard and orange from where the color mixed and dried against his golden locks. Dammit, I'm supposed to be the pessimist, not you.

For the rest of the night, actually, Naruto just isn't... Naruto. He doesn't bring up conversations, he doesn't bring up seemingly distant memories, he doesn't even fake a smile. As I re-light the fire to warm up a little before I succumb to what the chill night brings, Naruto doesn't accompany me. I feel lonely. When the fire dies, it's freezing as usual. I lie down in the tent and for the first time since being out here with him, Naruto and I don't touch as we sleep.

As usual, I wake up before him. I scoot close to him in the morning and wait for him to move as he normally does when he's asleep and I touch him. He doesn't move. I guess he's awake.

"Are you awake?" I ask for clarification.

"Yeah, I'm up," he quietly replies.

"How are you feeling?"

"I only have one leg." I had a feeling. As soon as he started grabbing my shoulders and screaming that he changed his mind, I knew he would be depressed. But it's still for the better.

"But you're alive."

"My leg is fucking missing. I'll never be able to play sports professionally now. I'll never be a regular person. I won't be able to swim or climb or dance or fuck someone normally anymore. I'll always be worried about it."

"Naruto, I am so sorry I had to amputate your leg. Honestly, I am. I'm sorry I couldn't treat your leg in the first place and I'm sorry to have put you through so much pain. Even so, what you just said is ridiculous. You never had any type of aspiration to be a professional sports player—"

"—yeah but now I don't even have the option if I want—"

I cut him off. "You'll easily be able to do sports and climb and swim and whatever the fuck else you want to do. Prosthetic legs are a thing. A woman mentioned on the news a while ago had lost both her feet, and she's a professional dancer now. Stop feeling bad for yourself. You're alive." He stares at me with his mouth open. "It's too early for this shit." My tone sounds harsh even in my own ears, and I should probably be supporting him, but I can't help but feel like everything bad that's happening is my fault and I'm frustrated. I shouldn't have taken it out on him, though. What the hell is wrong with me?

I push the foil blanket off of myself (since we ran out of water, I brought it back in) and sit up to open the tent's flap and walk outside. It's breezy today. I don't need Naruto's shirt. He should probably be wearing it anyway. I hear 'Sasuke!' come from the tent so I poke my head in.

"Give me a piggyback ride. I have an excuse now." I roll my eyes.

"Naruto, you really should rest a couple days. Your wound is really fresh."

"I know. It really hurts... Can you just help me to sit outside at least?"

"Fine." I put the foil blanket out on the sand to reduce the risk of sand getting through the fabric and gauze. I get down on my heels and hold my arms out so Naruto can grab on. I notice the weight difference right away compared to when I pulled him back from the tree incident. Naruto holds onto my back and I hold onto his good thigh and his ass. The distorted weight distribution throws me off at first, but I quickly grow accustomed as I walk out of the tent on my knees to set Naruto onto the blanket. "Happy now?"

"Gettin' there," he says. His stump hasn't bled through to the outer fabric. Good. He sits with his good leg's knee in the air. His right forearm rests on it while his left hand supports him from behind. He's dirty, unshaved, sad, and extremely worn out, but if I'm being honest, I think this is the first time I've consciously thought of Naruto as being an attractive person.

"Here, I'm going to take that tourniquet off and see what happens," I tell him as I lean down.

"Whoa! What if I start bleeding everywhere?"

"You need blood cells here eventually to heal you up, dumbass. If you start bleeding heavily, I'll put it back on, don't worry." I slowly untwist the stick in the contraption and wait for something bad to happen. A little blood comes through, but it's nothing horrible. I sit with him for a few minutes to make sure all is well, and when I confirm it's all good, I say, "Alright well, I'm going to go through the jungle today to look for shit." I dip into the tent for a moment to grab the hunting knife.

"Take me with you!"

I grin as I stand beside him. "You're an idiot. You need to let your thigh rest. Stay here. I'll be back in a few hours."

"Worth a shot. See ya, teme."

"See you in a bit."

* * *

 

I'm about an hour into my walk through the woods, and I suddenly feel grateful. Grateful for Naruto's life and as much as I hate to say, being on this beach is a hundred times better than being out on that fucking ocean. I feel useful here. But God damn, I have never been so fucking hungry in my entire life. I'd eat anything. I stoop so low as to look out for bugs.

Food aside, I really miss my shower. As embarrassing as it is, I miss singing in the shower almost as I miss washing myself and shaving my face. I used to look forward to it. I don't know if I was quiet enough to where Naruto couldn't hear me (he would come to my house any hour of the day for my Playstation), but I think if he knew, he would have said something.

"He gave me hope when hope was gone, he gave me strength to journey on... who am I? Who am I?! I'm Jean Valjean!~" I laugh to myself. God, this feels so good. I feel the necessity to keep up appearances, though. The last time I sang was... on the raft in the ocean with Naruto, singing  _Les Miserables_. I'm not sure he knows how much I loved it though. I would have sang with him all day if it didn't make me feel so... out of place, I guess would be the phrase. I'm not bad at singing. In middle school I sang in the choir and had the lead role in a musical play, but in high school I felt the need to focus on studying. Looking back now... all this knowledge I have and the great college I got into and the beneficial job offer... was it worth it? Look at where I am. Sometimes I wish I would have done things I was truly interested in. I just wanted to make my Mother proud, I guess. Even though she was gone. So I was forced to hide myself, and now I'm in too deep. To the world, this is Sasuke Uchiha—icy, cold, proud, confident, intelligent, quiet, condemning, loner, purposed, deliberate, focused. But they can think what they want. I like that people don't know my business.

The only person who sees through my façade is Naruto, and I both hate and love him for it.

I'm interrupted from my thoughts when I see a bird on the ground about twenty yards in front of me. It's small, but it's something. I know it's probably impossible to capture, but I need to try. I crouch down to the ground and  _slowly_  walk towards it. I didn't know I could move this slowly. By the time I get over there it will have flown away out of boredom. However, it doesn't move. I'm almost on top of it and realize it's a fledgling. It can't even fly yet. I know how desperate I've become when I kill it anyway. If it isn't mine, it'll be some other animal's dinner. I carry it with me as I keep on walking.

As my three hour mark is coming up, I realize I've never been this deep in the jungle. I see a clearing up ahead and unintentionally quicken my steps. My eyes widen. It's a village?! People?! I run with the tiny bird still wrapped gently in my hand. When my feet reach the opening of the clearing, I realize something isn't right. It's so quiet. The tiny, wooden houses are browned, broken, and dirtied with nature. I begin looking through the houses to find supplies, but many are empty—only dirt, leaves, and bugs occupy these houses. Where did these people go?

"Woof!" I jump at the unsuspected noise and turn around to face it. My heart skips a beat. A dog. A skinny, drooling, smiling dog that's wagging its tail and staring up at me. A mutt. It's white with large, pointed ears and a pink nose. It almost resembles a small German Shepherd. I crouch down and hold out my hand.

With my tongue against the back of my teeth I make the "T-t-t-t-t" noise to call him over. He comes right away and I smile as he almost forces me to pet him. He pushes his nose and head against my hand and I scratch behind his ears. As I look him over, I see his ribs poking out all over the place and his hip bones are clearly visible. "You aren't doing too well, either, huh buddy?" I also notice that he is actually a she. "Well, well... where did you come from? You're a sweet dog, aren't you? Where's your owner, hm?" I wonder if there are people around here somewhere. If not, where did they go? Why did they leave?

I continue scratching her ears and neck, to her delight. As horrified as I am, my mouth is drooling. I could eat this dog if I really wanted to... I shake the idea off for now. I'll let Naruto help me decide about that. But he has always loved animals. Maybe I should leave her here... we can't even feed ourselves and I don't really like pets.

I pat her head and continue looking around the little village. There are no people. There are no supplies. Nothing but tiny buildings. Naruto and I could stay in the houses, but then if help does come, they definitely won't be able to find us. We'll be too deep in the jungle. I'll discuss with Naruto later about things here.

As I look into the last couple of houses, I find canned food. There are only four cans of green beans on the little table but God damn, I've never wanted to eat green beans so badly before. I'm salivating again, wanting to cut the tops off and swallow an entire can without bothering to chew the contents, but I decide that if Naruto can wait, so can I. I hold the canned beans in my arms along with the little bird and start heading back to the tent. The dog stays at my heels the entire way. Fuck.

* * *

 I arrive back on the beach by evening and Naruto is still sitting outside on the foil blanket. But the entire area around his foil blanket is a crappy, but fairly large, sand castle. "Haha, what the fuck are you doing?" I ask.

Naruto turns around and starts with, "Fuck you, I'm building a—OH MY GOD! A DOG!" He stretches his arms out to reach for the dog and continues yelling. "COME HERE, DOGGIE, AWWW!" I'm glad to see he's in a better mood now. The dog licks him all over his face and lets him hug her. "Where did it come from?"

"Dunnoe, she just scared the shit out of me and then followed me back here. I found some green beans in an abandoned village and a little bird, too."

Naruto throws his hands up in the air. "We eat like kings tonight!" I can't help but smile at his enthusiasm. He pauses for a moment and looks a little concerned. "What are we doing with the dog?" He's thinking the same thing I am, then.

"Not sure. I was hoping you could think it over with me. There's no way we can feed it."

"Should we..." he makes a face and does a short nod towards the dog.

"I'm not sure. Honestly, I'm starving and I would love to, but look how skinny she is. I wonder if there'd even be any meat."

"I don't know what's worse," Naruto starts, "killing and eating a starving dog, or eating in front of a starving dog."

"Well, whatever we decide, she doesn't look like she has much left in her, so don't name her," I warn as he supports her muzzle with one hand and rubs between her ears with the other, "you'll get attached."

* * *

We were going to split a can of green beans, but I remembered my regrets earlier about hoarding supplies, so we eat a can each, heated up in the fire. We do split the scraps of meat from the tiny bird, though.

We sit on the foil blanket in the cool night, surrounded by Naruto's little sand castle village. I'm so glad to have his company tonight. "Green beans have never tasted so damn good," he says with a mouthful of food.

"Tell me about it," I agree. My stomach has never felt so full out here. The dog watches us while we eat. Puppy-dog eyes stare at me when she thinks I'm not looking. She moves from sitting to lying down with her sad face in the sand.

"So what was it you were saying about a village?" Naruto asks.

"Oh, there was a village with fifteen or twenty little wooden houses in it. They were all totally empty except for the one with these beans."

"I wonder where everyone went."

I shrug my shoulders in the I-Don't-Know gesture. "I can look again another time. Not sure if I'll be up for walking around for that long again tomorrow. Today left me so exhausted."

"Sure thing, we've got all the time in the world," he says sourly, but smiles so I know he's just messing with me.

"How's your leg?"

"You mean my stump? It hurts a lot. I think it's mainly the bone that's aching the most. As long as I don't touch it, the skin and muscle parts don't hurt. I can feel myself moving my foot right now, even though it isn't there. Weird right?" His tone is more sad than curious. I look at him with a sorry expression before he waves off the conversation.

"It'll be okay," he adds.

The fire eventually starts dying down and I prepare to help Naruto into our tent. "C'mon," I tell him as his arms wrap around my shoulders and his leg pushes him until I grab onto his good thigh and pull him forward. I'm careful to hold his ass instead of his injured half-leg. I bend over to pick up the foil blanket, too, and have Naruto hold onto that.

I lower him down just inside the tent and he hobbles the rest of the way inside like he did when his leg was first injured. I prepare to follow him when I hear a whine. I turn to stare the dog right in the face. She looks so sad. Should I let her in? I glance to Naruto who slightly nods his head and I whistle for the dog to follow. God dammit, we're already attached. I hate pets. I zip the flap shut behind her.

I'm in the middle, between Naruto on my right and the dog on my left. I turn on my side with my back to Naruto, and I suddenly feel his hand on my face. If he's trying to feel my facial hair again, I swear to God.

"Sasuke," he gently says.

"What is it?"

"Will you give me a kiss?" he asks so softly. He asks almost every night, and I usually deny him. But the soft desperation in his voice causes me to turn around, hold his dirty head in my hands, and give him a single, long, warm kiss on the lips. When I pull away, he's grinning like an idiot. The small bit of moonlight finding its way through the orange walls give Naruto a glow I hadn't noticed before. I rub his growing beard with my fingers. Once again, just as earlier today, I'm thinking about how I find him attractive. In what way, I couldn't say. I don't know. I place my hand on his forehead. Still hot, but at least he isn't sweating. I hope this is a sign of progress.

"Goodnight," I tell him, as I do every night.

"Hehe, goodnight, Sas. Goodnight, Sandy."

"I can't believe you fucking named the damned dog 'Sandy'," I groan as I turn to my regular sleeping side.

"Clever right?" I can hear the smile in his voice.

I'm sure he can hear the smile in mine as I say, "Get some sleep, dumbass."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** Sorry, Naruto. I really do love you, Sunshine.


	8. Day 19-24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Working two jobs. Sorry for excuses, I just hardly have time for anything these days. ): [[The song I used is "All I ask of You" from Phantom of the Opera, but I much preferred to listen to the Josh Groban/Kelly Clarkson version when writing this (if you would like to listen while you read later on). (:]]

I wake up on the twenty-first day and my stomach feels so fucking empty. I imagine it looking like a big raisin. Maybe it's the size of an actual raisin, I don't know. But it feels so small and I'm so hungry. All of our food was eaten up a couple days ago and we haven't found anything since. No water either.

I sit up and become light-headed immediately. My God. I hold the sides of my head, shut my eyes tightly, and stay perfectly still until I feel like I won't pass out. I scratch my head as I glance down to Naruto. Still asleep, as usual. I scratch his head for half a second before exiting the tent and Sandy follows me out to the shore. Poor thing hasn't eaten anything (around us, at least) the entire three days she's been around. I feel bad, but my health is more important that a dog's, I think. She might actually get to eat something though because she disappears for hours at a time and finds us again at night to sleep in our tent. Bitch.

I take careful steps around the sand castle Naruto and I have been working on. It's shitty— _so_  shitty—but I always tell Naruto it's good. He plays along. He doesn't mind how bad it looks because it still makes us happy for some odd reason. I've peeked at Naruto's half-leg a time or two over the past couple days and it looks pretty good, but only time will tell if it'll end up the same way the original wound did. I don't know what I'll do then. I lick my lips. Rough. Dry. Ugh. I miss my old life. I run my hands along my bare sides. I can definitely feel my ribs. I don't look nearly as awful as the dog but I'm sure the bones will stick out soon enough. My appearance is the least of my concerns. I just want to feel healthy and clean. I wonder how Naruto is looking under that shirt which seems to hang more freely on him each day.

I should look for water today. I hear Sandy barking and turn around to see her halfway inside the tent. Her tail wags and I hear Naruto curse and then laugh before baby-talking to her. "You're a shithead, aren't you!?" I can hear the smile in his voice as he chuckles more and I listen as he gently demands the dog to get off of him. God, that laugh is such a beautiful noise these days. He's been depressed since I removed his leg. Laughs are usually only caused by the dog and mess ups in our sand castle. "SASUKEEEEEE!" I hear him call from inside the tent. "SASUKE, I WANT OUT."

"Shhh, you big baby, I'm right here," I say as I enter our tiny home again. "C'mon, then," I tell Naruto as I face my back to him so he can climb up. He grabs onto my shoulders and I hold him in the familiar places. As I lift his weight, I feel how heavy he's gotten. That doesn't seem right to me, though. No, I must be losing all of my strength. He holds the foil blanket as I walk him outside. I grab it to place on the sand as usual and set Naruto onto it like I do every day, but that defeated look today tells me right away he's tired of this. He's tired of relying on me for help. Can't say I'm tired of helping him though. My back aches, my head is in a constant state of vertigo, and my legs have begun to shake trying to carry the weight of two bodies, but he has helped me through so much. Naruto has done so fucking much for me not only out here, but throughout the years, and I'll help him again and again until it kills me.

I sit down and try to become consciously aware of my attitude. I've been too snappy lately. Naruto has too, but he has more reason to be. Not only is he starving to death and dehydrated, but from the knee down his left leg is nonexistent. I know it's all he can think about. It's all I can think about, too. My fault. It was my fault he lost it. Even if he says it's okay, I'm sure he'll hold a grudge against me for as long as he lives.

He doesn't talk to me as he works on the castle. He packs freshly wetted sand and dry sand together in his hands and pushes the creation onto the ground to shape it. It's pitiful, but he smiles a little. I sit down and help him with it. I know I need to look for water and food, but I just don't have any energy—which just means I'm going to have even less energy tomorrow, and the day after that...

We play with the sand for a good three hours. When Naruto decides he wants to talk, we end up talking about friends and things like we're only on vacation. We haven't talked about them in a while until now. I don't see them as my friends, truly, but they are Naruto's. I never felt as if I fit in with them. Even so, we talk as if we're going to see everyone again in a few days, but they are not happy-sounding conversations. The words and the meanings might seem like we're hopeful, but the tones we use are defeated. Twenty-one days we've been missing. Twenty days more than we had anticipated when the boat first sank.

It's only when Sandy comes back that I realize she's been gone again. Her mouth is bloody and she licks her lips. "So you have been eating without us, you little shit," I say as I rub her between the ears. Her dark, almond-shaped eyes close in delight as her tail wags and her jaw hangs open as she pants. "I'm envious of you, Sandy."

"What a bitch," Naruto complains light-heartedly. I look at him and his hands begin to move more slowly around the piles of sand. When they stop completely, Naruto looks at me seriously. "Should we just hope she fattens up so..." he lightly chews on his lower lip. I know he probably did that without thinking but the action makes his intentions clear. I know he's hungry. I'm fucking starving, too. I rub the back of the dog's neck. Sandy just looks so happy and smiley. I don't know if I can do it. I thought Naruto would be the one to care too much, but here I am... I can't. I can't kill this dog to eat her. I don't answer Naruto and I think he gets the hint because when I look at him again he's digging a new hole in the sand.

Naruto continues working on the sand castle. I just decide to sit in the sand. I'm as sunburnt as one could possibly imagine, with my shirt, torn to pieces, still wrapped around Naruto's leg. Not that I could salvage anything from the broken fabric now, anyway. I don't want to ask for Naruto's shirt either. I think about burying myself in the sand, but fuck, if I admit it, the damage is done. I'm burned as all hell.

* * *

That night, the cooled sand soothes my skin. I lie on my back at Naruto's side while he keeps sitting on the foil blanket. We stopped talking hours ago. We don't light a fire tonight because we can only use flares to light them now. We've run out of matches and only have two flares left so we have to wait until we're freezing our asses off to make a fire. Or find some food to cook. But neither is happening lately.

I'm guessing Naruto finishes his sand castle for today when he lies down on his back to look at the sky. There must be a million stars shining. The moon is so full and bright, too. We lie silently side by side for what feels like a very long time. We run out of things to talk about pretty often now. I stare at his face and he looks so serious. I don't like this Naruto. I miss goofy, annoying, innovative Naruto. But I understand why he's this way now.

Naruto's frown turns to me and his eyes—a beautiful dark shade of blue from the night—meet mine. "Sas, will you sing something to me?"

Uh oh. "What? I don't sing."

"Sas, I know you love to sing, you don't have to hide it."

"No I don't. Stop asking me."

"You sang with me when we were still floating in the ocean."

"So you'd stop."

"Please, Sas, sing me a song!"

"No."

"My leg is missing, please, it'll make me feel better." I glare at him and his threatening, but gentle, grin.

"Don't try to guilt me into it," I say as I move my face back to the sky and close my eyes. I feel guilty anyway.

"I didn't want to tell you this because I was afraid you would stop," he starts, "but I used to be able to hear you sing in the shower." God fucking dammit. It's a rare occasion when I feel my face blush—Naruto has been giving me reason to blush so often out here. But he pretends not to notice right now, bless him. "You have an awesome voice, please sing something."

It takes me a bit, but Naruto continues pestering me; he spills more 'please' phrases than I've ever heard in the course of two minutes. "Fucking fine! Shut up! I'll sing one song, but then you have to be quiet, okay!? Shit."

"Okay, deal!" Naruto yells as he stares at me. At least he isn't thinking about his leg.

I feel sort of nervous. But apparently he hears me all the time anyway so I just decide to get it over with. "No more talk of darkness... forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here. Nothing can harm you. My words will warm and calm you—~"

"You really love musicals, don't you?" he interrupts, smiling.

I shoot him a scowl. "Interrupt me again and I'm going to stop," I threaten.

"Okay, okay, fine," he nods. I take a breath to continue and he interjects again. "Is this the actual musical or Josh Groban?"

"Josh Groban! Why does that matter?! Shut up!"

"I'm sorry—!"

I cut him off by singing louder. "Let me be your freedom. Let daylight dry your tears. I'm here... with you, beside you... to guard you and to guide you—"

He interrupts me again. I stare at him wide-eyed as he sings the next part of the duet in an ugly high voice. "Say you'll love me every waking moment... Turn my head, with talk of summertime..." he sounds horrible but I wouldn't have it any other way. I grin at him as he continues. He smiles as he sings when he sees me smiling at him. "Say you'll need me with you now and always... Promise me that all you say is true... That's all I ask of you~"

I close my eyes again as I sing the next part. "Let me be your shelter. Let me be your light—you're safe. No one will find you. Your fears are far behind you~"

Naruto pushes himself up and stays there with the support from his hands on the foil blanket behind his back. He turns his head and his facial expressions are so... well, expressive. I missed this. I missed outgoing Naruto. "All I want is freedom. A world with no more night, and you—" He gestures to me. "—always beside me... to hold me and to hide me~"

I sit up with him but only mildly, if at all, make dramatic emotions. "Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime. Let me lead you from your solitude. Say you want me with you here, beside you. Anywhere you go, let me go too... that's all I ask of you~"

"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime. Say the word and I will follow you~"

I don't know when his hand started holding mine.

We sing together in an unattractive, but perfect, harmony. "Share each day with me, each night, each morning~"

Naruto's voice gets soft and desperate. I remember telling him in high school that he should be an actor. "Say you love me—~"

I squeeze his hand. "You know I do~"

We sing together again. All I can hear is Naruto and his terrible singing but wonderful, expressive acting. "Love me. That's all I ask of you." We sit in quiet, comfortable silence as if we have music to wait on. "Anywhere you go, let me go too... Love me... that's all I ask... of you~"

Was it acting?

"Sorry, I decided to steal your spotlight. Hope you aren't too butthurt." Naruto turns his head to look at me and winks.

"Oh, fuck you. Why didn't you tell me you could hear me in the shower?"

"I didn't want you to stop. You seemed to really enjoy it and if I said something, you'd think I was making fun of you... but you're really amazing, Sas, and if we get back home please keep singing in the shower."

"Oh..." My blush is back. But I'm sad when I hear Naruto say "if". He has always been the optimistic one—becoming angry and correcting me when I say, "if we get back home," and now he's saying it, too.

Our hands are still holding one another's. His hand is rough and warm. His thumb rubs the side of mine and it sends tiny jolts throughout my body; not in a sexual way, more like happiness. I'm not alone. We aren't alone. We have each other. We can do this. We can get through this, Naruto.

The three of us wind up back in our tent in the usual way. Sandy lies in a corner and Naruto and I lie on our backs with our shoulders touching and I lean my head to the right to rest against his. I feel him place a kiss on the side of my head. His lips linger and I feel the cold air as his nose breaths in against my hair, then warm as he breathes out. A soft smooch noise sounds as he disconnects the skin of his mouth from me. I feel the comforting heat emitting itself from the left side of his body as he scoots himself as close to me as he can. It's nice.

* * *

Naruto's arms are around me in the morning. Extremely soft raindrops collide lightly with the tent walls and create a white noise I wish I could appreciate. I immediately push his arms away from me to get up and open the tent to hold my tongue to the sky so I can capture as much moisture I can. It feels like nothing, though. Almost as if it's just misty and I'm breathing in a cloud. It is soothing, nonetheless. I watch as Sandy leaves our company and disappears into the woods. Whatever. I leave the flap open so Naruto can lean out when he gets up. His good leg is carelessly draped over his bad one, I note, as I move back beside him. Suddenly he jolts awake. His arm shoots out and grabs my wrist hard and I don't know where my sudden burst of energy comes from but it scares the shit out of me and I jump to the other side of the tent.

"Sasuke!" Naruto yells in a voice that says he'd been sleeping a long time. His eyes are so big and blue and panicked. Mine are probably just as big and just as panicked. He's panting. His eyes dart around the small space, looking for something.

I calm myself down (although my heart feels as if it will burst from my chest) and grab his wrist to loosen his hand enough to hold. "It's okay, I'm right here, what's wrong?" I scoot close to him and he hugs my waist like a child hugs their mother. His warm, warm cheek presses against the skin of my abdomen. I wrap my arms around him as he half-lies, half-sits across the floor and my lap.

"Please don't go, Sasuke," he cries softly.

A nightmare? "What are you talking about? I'm not going anywhere."

"Don't go away anymore. Don't go into the woods." It's like he's almost begging me.

"You know I have to go in there, Naruto," I say. "I have to try and find food to keep us alive."

"I don't want you to go in there anymore. What if something happens? What if I'm left here alone? Sasuke I don't think I can do this anymore. I really don't."

"I would never leave you alone, Naruto. You should know that."

"Yeah but what if something happens to you, I mean. What if you get stuck like I did under that tree and I'm fucking..." he wipes his eyes on my pants. "What if you need me and... and I'm a fucking cripple who can't save his best friend? Huh!? I can't help you anymore, Sasuke. I can't help you and you know it and I know it's selfish of me to ask but please don't leave me anymore."

I look at those engulfing eyes and I'm speechless. My mouth has to be open and my eyes stare at him hugely. He's scared of being alone, too. Of course he is, of course he's afraid. It's natural. And I tell him that as I attempt to run my fingers through his tangled hair. "If something happens to me while I'm gone, Sandy will come back. You know what you can do with her if you need to." I feel Naruto tense beneath my hands. "Or not. Whatever you choose. Your leg seems to be healing well, too. You'll be able to use some kind of crutch soon, I'm sure—"

"Sasuke, you have to make me one! Right away! Today!" His hands are grabbing the fabric of my pants with as much determination as his eyes hold. I can't help but smile.

"Sure thing. I'll go out and try to find a strong stick for you to use, okay?" Immediately he looks worried. I feel like I need to talk to him as if he's a child. He appears as one, right now: clutching my clothes, staring up at me with gigantic pools of blue eyes, the immediate need of having something  _right fucking now, God dammit_.

He looks away and reluctantly mumbles, "Fine." I feel myself grinning gently at him. It is a really nice feeling... When the person you care most for worries for you, as well. I rub his back, pat it, and mentally prepare myself to expend the energy I no longer have to find Naruto a walking stick. Naruto has left my lap to stick his tongue and entire face out the front of tent to soak in the tiniest raindrops I've ever seen. Better than nothing, I suppose.

It's now or never. I shove Naruto out of the way in a you're-my-friend-but-a-pain-in-the-ass sort of manner, and he pushes me once I'm in front of him, almost causing me to fall in the sand. I regain my balance, turn to smile at him and tell him I'll be back, and head into the woods to look for the walking stick, and possibly food and water.

* * *

An hour in and it's hard to accept the canopy above blocking out the tiny rain that I was hoping would fall into some leaves somewhere. It's so dry in here, other than slight dew. Cold, too. It didn't take me long to find a good, thick stick for Naruto to use for a crutch. I wish I could find vines to make it an actual crutch rather than just something to hold onto, but this will do fine for now. My legs are already sore. I'm not even sure I can walk an hour back. I wonder how worried Naruto really is. What does he do when I'm gone? What does he think about?

* * *

When I'm back in the tent, Naruto hugs me. That's so out of character for him. I would be less surprised if he pecked me on the lips or just smiled and asked how things went. Hell, if he ignored me I'd be less surprised. But Naruto full on, squeezes the life out of me. I drop the stick to the ground and shiver when I feel how cold his hands are on my wet, bare back. His clothed chest is fully against my naked one and his chin rests on my shoulder. "What's the matter?" I quietly ask as my arms find their way around him as well. His good knee is supporting all his weight as his bad leg is a couple inches short of reaching the ground.

"Just glad you're back," he mumbles.

"I leave all the time, why are you so insistent that I stay now? Did you have a nightmare this morning? Is that why you went crazy when you woke up?"

Naruto holds me tighter as he mutters, "I'll tell you later." I leave it at that. He never ends up telling me.

"Here, I found a stick I thought would be good for your height. I wanted to make you a real crutch but this is all I could manage to get. I didn't find food or anything either, I'm sorry, I'm just too tired," I confess.

He smiles so wide which, of course, always makes me smile, too. "Thank you so much, Sas. I really don't know what I'd do without you. I'd be dead." He doesn't meet my eyes, but continues to examine the makeshift cane I've brought him. I don't have anything to reply with.

For the rest of the day, I assist Naruto as he attempts to practice walking with the stick. It's extremely difficult for him—not just because of the sand on the beach but also because his good leg is not so good anymore. It's weak. I told him he needed to exercise it with easy leg workouts while he lies around, but how can one exercise when so hungry and so in need of nutrition? It's been so long since he's had to walk, no wonder this is hard for him. He doesn't complain, though. Not once did I hear him groan or whine about how much he ached. I know his arms but hurt, too, supporting almost his entire body to take one step. It's night before he stops.

Sandy doesn't come back that night and I genuinely hope she's okay. Naruto and I reluctantly zip the tent flap shut, as freezing as we are, and hope the dog will be outside in the morning.

We sleep quite close again that night. Naruto whispers 'thank you' again and again as if I hadn't heard him before. I didn't do anything, just picked up a stick for him. He's the one doing all the work. I tell him to shut up and I face the opposite direction to fall asleep. It really is empty in here without our pet.

* * *

Over the course of three days, Naruto's determination is making him a pro. He has blisters and callouses on his hands—sometimes they even bleed—but he's been getting better at using the stick. He can only use it for so long, though, because he is extremely weak. We haven't eaten anything in about a week. It's agonizing. In the morning, everything is good. But come afternoon, Naruto and I both feel awful. We nap often. We argue with each other over the stupidest shit and are constantly yelling at each other. I know we don't mean it. I hope Naruto knows too. It's the hunger. Sandy still hasn't come back and my feelings for her have since gone away. I think if I see her again I have to eat her. I haven't told Naruto this, though. I'm sure he wouldn't mind, either.

"Sasuke, you're getting really thin..." Naruto comments.

"Lift up your shirt," I say, half-asking. He's skinny. His muscles are disappearing because there was almost no fat on him. I reach out and stoke his side, feeling the effects of my failed searches for nutrition. "I'm sorry I'm ruining our lives," I confess without thinking. I can't think before I say things anymore.

"Don't say that," he replies, stroking my cheek. His expression turns to worry. "Your face is getting slimmer. You're losing your color. Sasuke you were already stick skinny but now... you look so unhealthy. We really need to get out you home..."

"Keep the compliments coming," I groan as I roll my eyes.

"You know what I'm going to do Sasuke?" I only glance to him. "I'm going to drag this raft back into the sea." My eyes widen. "I have to do something. We can't fucking sit here anymore. We have to attempt to leave—"

"NO! No! I am  _not_ going back out there!" I yell as I point in the direction of the ocean. "I'm not doing it, Naruto!"

"Sas, what else can we do? Do you want to sit here and continue to die? We have  _nothi_ —"

"I don't care!" I could scream. "I'm not going back into that water!" I wish I could cry. "I'd rather die here than out there! You must be an idiot to think I'm going to go back to the ocean!" I don't mean to say the last part, but my mouth is talking too fast for my brain to keep up with. "I'm sorry, I didn't—"

"It's fine." That's all he says. He rolls over in the tent. It's about that time of day we fall asleep again. I'm always so sleepy now. So is Naruto.

I have to try something to give him some kind of hope, though. "Want to go into the woods with me today? I think it may be the last trip I'm able to manage."

"Later," he tells me. I'm guessing he needs to rest now. I don't say anything else as I lie down to sleep, too.

* * *

Later that day, once we've awoken a second time, we try for the woods. Naruto can be pretty fast with his walking stick when he wants to be, and keeps up with me easily because I've slowed down a lot since we first came here.

I feel like we've walked for hours. Looking for food we can scrounge up. Birds, rodents, bugs, fruit,  _anything_. We find a few crickets, and we take turns eating ones we catch. They've never tasted so good. In our regular life, I would never be stooped so fucking low to eat insects. It doesn't matter here. I've eaten more bugs than meat in this new world. Before I know it, we've made it to the abandoned village I found a little while ago—where I found Sandy. I don't know how the fuck we're going to walk three hours back to our tent.

"Hey..." I mumble. "Naruto, Naruto this is the place I told you of a while back. With the dog."

"Whoa... This place is pretty nice. I wish we knew no one was coming to rescue us. We could've been sleeping here, huh?" Yeah, we could have.

"Maybe we should start. We'd need the blanket though. And I'd want the keep the raft for some kind of cushion against the wood, you know."

"Keep Queen Sasuke comfortable in the wilderness," he mocked. "Yes, Your Highness, your wish is my command."

"That's a genie, dumbass."

"What the fuck ever."

We explore the area and learn it's still as deserted as ever. However, there's a sort-of path after this area, which I thought had previously been completely surrounded by trees. Did I miss it last time? Did it just appear? My adrenaline starts working me up.

"Let's go this way," I command.

"Teme, I'm taking a break. I have to sit for a minute. I'm sorry, I'm fucking tired and my hands are starting to bleed." He finds a spot in one of the tiny houses and throws his stick inside before lying down. I follow, but don't lie down.

"I'm going to see what's through that grove. I'll be back."

"Please be careful," he says seriously before I nod and continue walking.

My head is pounding. I think I'm growing a migraine which, combined with my legs and feet feeling completely dead, is not a good thing. We'll have to rest here tonight, either way. I use the last of my energy to walk through that grove. It's thick with vegetation and I'm having trouble with footing, but I make it through. I watch where I'm stepping when I find the opening and next to my feet... are vegetables. Carrots. Squash. Potatoes. When I look up I swear to God it's the most beautiful sight I have ever seen.

Sandy is wagging her tail, eyeing a chicken behind a weak fence, pecking at grain. I glace around in awe. I'm not sure what I look like to the stranger who is staring at me with a spade in his hand, but bet your fucking ass I've never seen someone with such a heavenly glow surrounding them. I fall to my knees. My hands squeeze the soft soil between my fingers and I'm crying without tears. The small man drops his tool and runs over to me with such gentle, genuine concern. It's all I can do to reach out to him, and once he helps me back up, I point to the direction of Naruto, and ask him to call someone, anyone, to tell them we're alive.


	9. Recovery: Day 1-8

We ended up being on some small island far off the coast of Hawaii, closer to the continental US, which would be expected since we began from Southern California.

Soon enough help is called and we're rescued hours later. I can't even begin to describe the look on Naruto's face when I told him—the same expression the person I came across probably saw on my own face. A mix of wonder, happiness, and disbelief on a face close to death. Sandy winds up in a helicopter with us because Naruto just  _had_  to have her when we learned the old man didn't know where she came from either. I'm not sure why I feel a strange sense of sadness when I see our tiny tent on the shoreline from the sky. I see the long wall of rocks that served (to me) a marker of where I buried Naruto's leg. I see the clearing where the small wooden houses were and the farm I stumbled upon. It was a huge farm. If I had went west probably half a mile, we would have been out of here long before now.

Naruto... I can tell how upset he is. I don't blame him. I continue kicking myself about that path that might have been there the whole time. I swear it wasn't there the first time, though. Naruto says he believes me, but his huffing tells me he's lying. He thinks I fucked up again. I try to tell him over and over above the sound of the chopping blades of the helicopter—that path  _wasn't_  there... right? The first time I went to that area, Naruto still had his leg. If that path, the area, the man, everything was there the first time around, we would have been saved, we wouldn't be so fucking malnourished, and Naruto would probably have his god damn leg. But I'm sure I would have noticed the path the first time if it had been there, so I stick to my memory

Paramedics are working on us constantly. Taking our vitals, giving us IVs, looking in our mouths, checking our pupils, feeling our muscle mass, are only a few things. They are more than a little concerned about Naruto's leg, and two paramedics remove the shreds of fabric from my shirt to examine it. Naruto explains to them absolutely everything; adding in a few details that were unnecessary to sound dramatic. That's Naruto, alright. When he concludes his story, the flight medics are staring at us both in disbelief of what has happened in less than a month out here away from civilization. I force myself to look at the stump Naruto now owns, and it doesn't look half bad. It's a little red, but healing up fine. The medics explain what the doctor will probably have to do—re-open the wound, sand down the bone so it's smooth, flush the area out, and close it back up more cleanly. I'm proud my handiwork lasted until we were rescued.

As soon as we land we ask for a phone to contact our loved ones. Naruto sighs deeply in the wheelchair prepared for him. They've given me one, as well, and I'm thanking God we are in these rather than stretchers. He holds the phone to his ear with a bandaged hand and his other wounded hand pushes his hair back from his forehead and holds it there. I hear "I'm okay, Dad." He's laughing like he can't believe it either, and his voice cracks as he beings another dry cry. "Yeah. Yeah Sasuke's okay, too. Mmhm." He sniffles. "Yep. Yes. Yes we're at that hospital. Okay. I love you, Dad." I hear a loud voice come from the speaker and Naruto has to hold the phone away from his head for a second. "Yes, Mom, everything is fine—" he looks down at the ghost of his limb. "Everything is fine," he repeats. "Will you tell dad I'm so sorry about the boat?" He's still worried about that? "Hahaha, yeah... it's gone for good. Okay, okay, thanks, Mom. Yes. I'll see you soon. Sasuke has to call his brother, I have to go. I love you, too." He hangs up and when he turns to hand the phone to me, his emotions are going crazy all over his face. His mouth is smiling, but his eyes are sad.

I quickly dial Itachi's number. "Hello?" I could cry just from hearing his voice. God, I never realized how much I really love him.

"Itachi? It's Sasuke." There's silence for a few seconds.

"Sasuke," his voice makes it clear that he's crying. "I, oh, thank God you're okay. We've been so worried. Father's at work. Where are you? Are you at the hospital?"

"I'll call him next. I'm in the city at CareMed off First."

"Are you hurt? What's your condition? Is Naruto with you?"

"I'm fine, just malnourished. Naruto's here... he's okay but he's been in better shape." I feel so guilty.

"Okay, good. Call Father. He's been so worried about you, Sasuke. More than you'd ever believe."

"Alright thanks, Itachi. See you soon."

"See you."

I dial my father's number. It goes to voicemail; he never was one to answer calls he didn't know the number for. I try his work phone, he usually answers that. "Uchiha speaking."

"It's Sasuke," I repeat.

I hear him gasp. "Oh—oh my—Sasuke! Where are you? Are you alright? What happened?"

"You've never been one to be so concerned," I say, half-joking. He laughs but not because of the joke. He's happy I'm home. "I'm fine. Naruto's okay, too. I'll tell you about it in person." I proceed to tell him the hospital we're at and he says he's on his way before we hang up.

Naruto leaves his parents' numbers with a paramedic for Sandy. Someone's taking her to a vet.

Naruto reaches over to grab my hand while they wheel us through the halls of a hospital. I run my thumb along his hand and I hold just a little tighter before we have to separate so they can run tests on us and get us situated in separate rooms. When I realize this, my mouth blurts out, "No!" and I'm shocked at myself, but my mouth is true to my thoughts. I don't want to be separated from him. Never again. Naruto gives a sympathetic smile, pats my hand, and says "I have to go to surgery soon, remember? I'll see you in a little while, Sas. Be patient, I'll come back. We're safe now."  _We're safe now_. With that, he's wheeled away. I wonder if they'll wait for his parents to come first. He is a grown man after all. Can he ask them to wait for Minato and Kushina before they begin? Is his condition so dire? I can't imagine how happy they'll be to know he's okay. Naruto's family is just so close, probably because he's their only child. My father has always been concerned with Itachi because he's the first born son, and even with Itachi, he's pretty distant.

Because of that, I'm surprised he has tears in his eyes and gently hugs me when he and Itachi come to see me in my hospital bed.

Itachi speaks when my father and I separate. "Nice to see you're letting a beard grow in. Masculine, huh, Sa—"

"Shut up." My grin turns to a glare, but I break a smile and Itachi's doesn't falter.

"Where's Naruto? Is he okay?" Itachi questions.

"I told you, he's fine. They're prepping him for surgery, I guess," I explain as I look away. My guilt won't allow me to meet his eyes.

Itachi asks calmly, "Surgery? What happened?" I think he knows how hurt I feel.

"I... Naruto's leg was injured so badly... It was infected and nasty, so I—I..." I still can't look either of them in the face. "I had to amputate it while we were stranded. It was killing him."

It's quiet for a couple seconds too long. Itachi eventually places a hand on mine as I clench the thin sheet draped over my lower half. "That took a lot of strength, Sasuke," he begins. "It must have been hard on the both of you. If that's really all you could do, than it more than likely saved his life." He's talking to me like a child, but I still find it comforting that he thinks my choice was the right one.

The doctor soon comes in to give me another once-over after the nurses took my vitals and any information I could give them. I'm surprisingly in okay condition. I just need vitamins and my stomach has to adjust to eating normally again, but it could be worse. I could be in the operating room getting my bone sanded away and having to heal a huge wound for a second time.

Itachi informs me that he's called a couple of our friends to let everyone know we're okay, but told them to wait awhile to come visit because he knows how I am around "the group" when Naruto isn't around. He's the only one who can make me feel entirely comfortable around them because he holds all of us together. He said before that they missed seeing me, but that's just something people say without acting on, right?

Within half an hour, everyone is here. I mean, everyone. They won't all fit in my room and have to take turns coming in to see me. I'm surprised their first sentence to me isn't "where's Naruto," but it takes a turn of "Sasuke, we were so worried about you," "What the hell happened," and "How are you feeling". If I was an emotional person, I might've cried. These people truly care about me. I ignore them and put them to the side. I work extra hours and miss parties and celebrations. I take more than I give and they still wish for my well-being. Many of them have tears in their eyes. Ino (whom I have a different view of now because of the snake story) is one of the first to gently embrace me, she's visibly crying and smiling, although all I've shown her before is disdain. Kiba comes to shake my hand, laugh at my beard, and tell me how much they all missed Naruto and I. He snuffles and wipes his eyes as he turns and walks back towards the door. Hinata is her usual quiet, stuttering self, but her concern for me is greater than she communicates. Lee is bawling his eyes out and calling me an inspiration.

One by one, everyone without fail comes in to see me. Naruto doesn't leave my mind the entire time. I'll leave the story-telling of what happened while we were gone to him. I'm sure he'd want to be the one to tell everyone the  _adventure_  we had together. I roll my eyes and smirk thinking of how he's going to describe that nightmare to our friends.

* * *

Naruto's parents come into my room about an hour later, looking quite shaken up with pink noses and tired, red eyes. She knows what I did to him. She knows I cut off a piece of her child. I want to hide. I don't want to look at her. My stomach has a feeling of nervousness. "Sasuke," she says as she makes her way over to the side of my bed. "I'm so grateful to you," Kushina tells me as her arms wrap around my neck. My eyes widen. "Thank you for saving our Naruto. Thank you, thank you,  _thank you_." She kisses my cheek and forehead and nose repeatedly before holding my head to her chest and kissing my hair, as a mother would do. It makes me miss my own.

"No, ma'am, Naruto was the one who saved me. Something like what I did... I would have been dead in three days if it weren't for him." She holds the sides of my head in her hands and her amazingly blue eyes shimmer with tears. Her fingers slide between locks of my hair.

"You're a perfect team, aren't you?" She smiles. "I'm so glad you boys are okay. You have—" her voice becomes sad and sounds that particular way when one is about to cry. "You have no idea how glad we all are. We were so worried."

I talk to her as I look at her husband. "It's all thanks to Mr. Namikaze's emergency bag he left. Without that, I can guarantee we would be dead. There's no doubt in my mind." Naruto's father  _pft_ s and smiles as a palm wipes one of his eyes. "All I brought back with me was the knife. It's all I had when we were rescued. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about the stupid bag or the supplies," Minato laughs. "Don't worry about the boat, either. Naruto seemed more worried about that than his well-being, God knows why..." He grabs one of my hands with both of his and begins to cry. Naruto is just like his father. "This probably is no consolation to you, but we're so thankful for what you've done. I don't want to know what kind of fight Naruto put up or the details of the operation you had to perform, but whatever you did, the doctor said it must have saved his life. Whatever Naruto was describing to him had him in shock. They said they just had to fix it up a little more, and check for other signs of traumatic injury inside his thigh. He's in surgery now. Will be for about four hours, they said." Four hours. At least he'll be asleep with anesthesia. And he has pain medicine now. Minato pats my knee over the sheet and leaves me with a 'thank you' nod as he tenderly holds Kushina's hand and walks out of the room.

* * *

The doctors give me small amounts of food every couple of hours, but I still feel like I'm going to be sick. They told me they'd lessen my portions for now until my digestive system regained some strength. Naruto's parents come back in about an hour after Naruto was scheduled to be out of surgery. "Is Naruto alright?!" I cry out.

Kushina still looks like she's been crying. Minato is holding her shoulders. "The doctor said everything went fine during surgery... It's all cleaned up now. He says the muscle was cut up a little too much though, but they were able to manage." I wince. "And the stump is a little shorter than when he came in, but the skin is all healthy for the most part and closed up nicely... He's just..." Minato takes a moment to sigh. "He's just having a little trouble coming out of the anesthesia." I want to puke.

"What does that mean? Is he okay? Is he... is he going to wake up?" I feel tears in my eyes, now hydrated from the IV.

"He was supposed to be awake about a half hour ago at the latest. His vitals are good. He's just not waking up."

Oh God... Oh my fucking God! After all that, after everything I've went through with him, Naruto just can't wake up from anesthesia? Minato must see the panic on my face and rushes to console me. "Don't worry, it's okay. It just takes a little longer for some people to wake up. He'll be fine."

Three hours later. Three hours of worrying that my friend is in a permanent coma ends, and he wakes up. I need to see him.

My IV and I find a wheelchair and Itachi pushes me to Naruto's recovery room. Everyone is crowded around him and when they move for me to see him, I'm heartbroken. He doesn't belong here, he doesn't belong here! Tears automatically well up in my eyes, and I grab one of his hands. Itachi asks everyone to give us privacy, and soon Naruto and I are the only ones in the room. We're both in hospital gowns, broken physically and emotionally, and holding hands. The only difference is I'm crying and Naruto is weakly smiling.

"Stop doing that," Naruto says in a raspy voice. "I hate seeing you cry."

"I'm so glad you're okay," I say, letting the tears fall. I've never been so glad to have this ability back.

"Me too," he grins. His hand strokes my cheek like it did when everything was sort-of normal on the beach. His grin turns into a full smile when he tells me, "You need to shave."

"Shut up, I know," I smile. My head leans into his hand and I stare into the exhausted, azure eyes.

He glances quickly to my lips and then looks into my eyes again. "Give me a kiss."

"Is it really the place to—" Naruto pulls the back of my head to him and our mouths join together. He kisses me so weakly, but it's warm and inviting. I kiss him a few times more before pulling away and leaning back in my chair.

"My leg is still missing," Naruto says, as if it would just come back when we came home.

"Yeah, I know. Let me look at it." He lifts up the sheet and his leg is a few inches shorter than when I cut it. It's bandaged up nicely. Way better than my fucking shirt.

"Hurts..." he groans.

"I'm sure... I'll tell them you need more pain meds. But I'm glad you finally got real medical attention," I say and chuckle.

"What do you mean, you gave me the best, Sas. They did say you shouldn't have cut through that much muscle though. I guess they needed more to shape in order to support the bone, so they ended up having to make my stump shorter," he laughs. Fuck. Naruto continues holding my hand. "Sasuke, I'm so glad. I'm so glad we're home. I'm sorry for getting you into that mess..." he says as he looks at me with genuine concern. "I'm sorry you were forced to cut my leg off. I don't blame you for that happening. The doctor said it saved my life... I'm just so sorry  _you_  had to go through that. I can't imagine how you felt after having to do it..." He really believes everything is his fault.

"Stop blaming yourself, idiot. It was neither of our faults. We did the best with what we were given... so... thank you for sticking with me the entire time." I feel my face heat up at my own words.

"As if I had a choice," he teases. "I mean, I needed  _someone_  to take care of me and, damn, you were all I had." He smirks at me and I glare at him although I know he's kidding. "Seriously, Sasuke. I'm glad you were with me. I don't think I could have survived there for that long with anyone else."

"I couldn't agree more."

* * *

The next week was all about strictly recovering. Naruto's leg is healing up much more quickly than doctors had anticipated, and he's been pretty loopy from all the pain meds. We've also been taking vitamins and eating slightly larger meals each day, but it'll be a long time before he can eat normal amounts of food again. Naruto lost around forty pounds while we were gone. He complains about his hard work at the gym having slipped away. I lost a good thirty. We're slowly working our way back up, though. Our friends come to see us in the hospital almost every day, and I can leave now whenever, but I don't want to leave Naruto's side. He's supposed to be discharged tomorrow. The doctors show Naruto and I how to clean, re-dress, and reduce pain and swelling in his wound, and they say we have to keep it up for about five weeks. After that he has to come back periodically for around six months. In two or three months he can see about being fitted for a prosthetic leg.

It's going to be such a long process, but I'm going to be here for him the entire time. He would do it for me, and I'm more than happy to do it for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter. (:


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